Review--The Rules by S. Renee Bess

The Rules
By S. Renee Bess
April 7, 2014
Lesbian fiction/ Mature/ African American/ Contemporary
172 pgs
Publisher: Regal Crest Enterprises, LLC
Kindle Edition

Blackmail, murder, missing persons, and concealed identities link lives that otherwise, would have remained unconnected.

London Phillips searches for affirmation and for Milagros Farrow, a revered lesbian author who seems to have vanished.

Lenah Miller arms herself against memories of her past as well as those who dismiss her because their backgrounds differ.

Rand Carson seeks to replace one lost interracial relationship with a second one.

Candace Dickerson executes a plot to enrich herself with other peoples' earnings.
The threads entwined around London's desire for connection with a kindred spirit, Lenah's wary skepticism, Rand's misguided ardor, and Candace's greed come undone when three fall victim to blackmail, one reappears from the ethers of the past, and another succumbs to murder.

I loved, loved this book. I wrote part of this review and posted it on Goodreads not really ready to fully express what I felt about this book. It's so deep and nuanced and maybe too hard for me to articulate everything I felt about it. It left me feeling like I had made a new friend who intimately shared an interesting life with me.

The Rules touches on so many different issues. Most particularly issues around being an African American and a lesbian and dealing with the expectations of both the white and black community both culturally and on a personal level. The way the characters experience their lives is expressed with a lot of insight into those issues. It's also about the importance of shared experiences in making relationships work and also the comfort involved in that even if a relationship doesn't flourish.

That this story is about mature women was another huge plus. It's fairly rare to read about women who are at a stage in their lives when experience has taught them that they don't have to rush into anything and can make decisions on who they are vs what’s expected in furthering their careers and in relating.

Author S. Renee Bess excels at in-depth characterizations and weaving a good story. Each of the characters in this story have distinct personalities and we get to see how each change slightly depending on who they are relating to. They are all connected even if they are unaware of how. And I particularly respect that all of the characters have flaws. Just when I'd think, oh I like this character and hope it works out for them, they do something kind of crappy and then I’d think, oh this is an interesting twist. However, their vulnerabilities were shown as well so it was easy to see their point of view even with negative traits at times.

London is sort of the main character and whenever she’s on screen, the story is written in first person. The other characters get a lot of page time as well so each reader might relate to any of them. Due to starting the book at the point of London’s childhood and upbringing, we get to see some of the experiences that helped shape who she is now in time. She’s an older woman who is at a point in her life when she wants to advance her career and maybe find love, but is in many ways accepting of where she’s at as well. There’s a certain assuredness and quietness about her, which seems to come from age and experience. She’s a very likable character and it’s through her we see the issues she and others face as an African Americans, women, and lesbians. We get to see her come to terms with her decisions about her life that are at times in conflict with the expectations of her community and how she’s been brought up.

Lenah, one of the other main characters, is portrayed as having both positive and negative qualities, as are most of the characters What I found intriguing about her is that the demise of her last relationship is about her not being ambitious enough for her partner, but when she meets London, she gets on her case about her career choices. Her role in this story is more about the shared experiences I mentioned up stream. She and London have a rocky start in their relationship, but in the end, it’s their shared commonality of being African American and lesbians and having similar cultural experiences even though they come from different social statuses. What I liked about her is that once a huge weight is lifted from her shoulders she becomes more open and honest with London, when she had been more critical of her initially. She changes and grows and I liked that.

It’s through both of these women that we also get to experience the everyday racism they experience in the form of “good intentions” from white people who think they are allies. This leads me to another thing I loved about this book; this is the first story really in which I’ve read a racist, appropriator white character who isn’t the overt, easy to hate racists.

Rand is an interesting character in that she thinks she’s standing up for, fighting for and supporting African Americans, but is really a fetishizer of black women and an appropriator of black culture. She is the typical white person who thinks they are progressive and open minded, but who are so totally clueless in how racist they really are. Renee Bess did an amazing job of showing vs telling, making the impact of that dichotomy more potent.

Candace is an easily dislikable character and maybe the only one who the author really didn’t go into what makes her tick. However, she’s kind of the catalyst for events that affect all the characters in both good and bad ways so maybe her being less explained was good.

I’d also like to point out that Renee Bess offers incredible insight into how we make judgments based on race and how our social upbringing affects our choices. Normally I’m not really for reading stories that are not clearly romance or suspense like this story is, however, Renee Bess totally sucked me in with her writing and her ability to articulate these issues and made me think about a lot about my own attitudes and what are the everyday experiences of African Americans and lesbians.

I think this author's writing is getting better and better. Will definitely pick up another of her books.

Heat level: 0

Grade: 5 Stars

Review- Cream by Christiana Harrell

Cream
By Christiana Harrell
Aug 31, 2013
Contemporary/Lesbian/Stud/Romance/Erotica/African American
230 Pgs
Pub-Self
Kindle Edition

Cream, an androgynous beauty, knows what it’s like to be abandoned, broke, and used. Left to the state by her parents and taken under the wing of her selfish foster mother, Cream sets her focus on one thing: money. She dives head first into the exotic lifestyle of stripping. Starting out in gentlemen clubs, drama seems to follow her wherever she goes. Instead of facing the turmoil, she moves on to the next city, causing more chaos than what she left behind.

She thinks she has life all figured out until she crosses paths with Payton, a daddy’s girl with lots of cash and a lust for women. Payton makes her learn things about herself that she never saw possible and with her new discovery comes a big change in her look and personality.

Cream is at the top of her game, surrounded by money and beautiful women. Then, one wild night forces her to discover yet another truth about herself and face the reality of her lifestyle. Will she continue to dwell in her unstable comfort zone? Or, will she finally open her eyes?

If I could ever call a book a reader whisperer, this would be it for me. Cream spoke to me in so many awesome and amazing ways. It’s such a raw and powerfully positive story of growth and acceptance. Cream as a character is also one of the most intense, real and dynamic female leads I’ve read in a long time.

What I loved so much about Cream is that she’s written as someone having a nice combination of savvy, rough street smarts and innocence. It’s that underlying innocent part of her, the part she’s managed to keep even with all the negative obstacles she’s had to deal with that helps her change and grow once she allows that part of her to emerge. That’s not to say she doesn’t have a lot of flaws and isn’t a nasty shit at times. But this is what makes her an interesting, complex character.

I also got off on how the author wrote this book. The way this story is written: language (colloquial), pacing, character development, were all spot on for me. The growth of Cream is slowly done and we get to see her change as she learns from her relationships and experiences. It’s a natural progression and I liked that it wasn’t rushed or that she suddenly had an epiphany that wasn’t natural to her character.

That the author wrote a character who works in the sex industry but isn’t being controlled, or doing it for “good” reasons, was a huge plus for me. Cream chooses it after that first night. She did have a crappy childhood. And she ends up stripping because she was pimped out by someone who should have protected her. But she embraces it, becomes the best stripper, and uses it to her advantage. She also enjoys it and makes no excuses, nor does she blame the world for it. And shockingly, she stays unaffected by the sexual nature of it, never having any attractions or sexual encounters.

One of Cream’s worst characteristics is being unable to get close to people and running all the time. She seemed to be missing the empathy chip for a good part of this book and I wondered if she’s actually just out of touch with her feelings, or if she really feels as emotionally cold towards others as she acts. But it’s clear after a while it’s a survival technique. It’s also what throws her into meeting new people and having experiences that push her out of that. 

Of course, both good and unsavory characters enter her life. And I will say that what was appealing to me was that there were no stereotypical characters. People who you’d think would try and take advantage of Cream don’t and those who you’d think would normally be nice, aren’t. I loved that.

This story is about Cream, but several other characters are very compelling as well. Payton is an interesting character in that she starts Cream on the road to growth, albeit, unknowingly. She’s the impetus for Cream to see that she has a lot of talent and helps her career flourish.  She’s also the one who turns Cream on to women, suggesting she’s not just a lesbian, but a stud. At first it felt like Payton would be a very positive influence on Cream in all aspects, not just her career, but things didn’t go as I thought.

Then there is Tasia. Tasia is the antithesis of pretty much everyone Cream has met. Tasia, like Cream, has been abused on several levels, but has kept her heart, hope and humanity. Even when she’s so clearly treated like shit from her fiancé and by her best friend, she still manages to keep hope that one day she will find love. This is not to say she’s a doormat. Like Cream though, she’s managed to keep some innocence locked away but it’s more on the surface for her.

Tasia and Cream meet mainly due to a betrayal, but more so because Tasia looks very much like the only “friend” Cream had ever had and probably the only person she had any feelings of love towards. Although Cream tries her usual shtick with Tasia, keeping things at a distance, something about Tasia’s vulnerability and positivity worms its way into Cream’s psyche and slowly breaks down her hard core emotional wall. Tasia also has an easy going, loving, but non-threatening or needy way about her that sparks something in Cream wherein for the first time in her life she finds herself opening up to another person and caring about their well-being.

I know there are some negative aspects to this book. There were some editing issues and well, I know intellectually it’s not subject matter for everyone; it represents a fairly specific world. Also, some (lesbians) might not like that Tasia’s sexual orientation is not really clear and it’s written more as she loves Cream vs being attracted to women. And also for my taste, even Cream, while clearly into women and not ever having an attraction to men, won’t commit to stating she’s a lesbian. However, I got so sucked into the story and the characters, I didn’t notice those things or they didn’t bother me. 

I would love to read another book by this author.

Heat level: 4-5- some graphic sexual situations, but more tell than show. But graphic language used.

Grade: 5 Stars

Review- Turn Me Out by T. Ariez

Turn Me Out
By T. Ariez
June 17, 2013
Contemporary/Lesbian/Erotica/Stud4Stud/ AA
16 pgs
Kindle edition

Angel and Ace are best friends who happen to both be studs. When Angel realizes that she has developed feelings for Ace, she devises a plan that will go against everything she's ever known and believed. She is tired of the traditions and rules that make her feelings taboo and decides to risk everything. Will it all be worth the risk?

This is a short, quicky story, but I loved it. The author has a fresh, straightforward voice but one which is also infused with a lot of heart.

I have little to vague knowledge of the sub groups that are part of the lesbian community. I have read some butch/femme and stone butch stuff, so it’s not unfamiliar. But this is the first time I’ve read about stud and boi relationships. So part of my turn-on in reading this was being introduced into this world. T. Ariez did a great job of giving an explanation for anyone not familiar with this that was integrated well with the flow of the story and didn’t feel like a wiki side bar. I did google some things though to get a better idea of some of the slang.

As a character, Angel is that person I’d love to know IRL. She’s going through a transformation of her identity and risks a lot to go with feelings that defy everything she feels she is and has represented until this point. She’s become attracted to another stud, Ace, whom she’s buds with, a taboo in her world. Not only that, she finds these new feelings also include wanting to be touched and be more feminine, which are diametrically opposite to her stone stud identity.

While Angel goes about getting with Ace in a way that some might feel wrong, she’s so open and vulnerable and humble as she goes for it in the only way she can think of to get Ace to see her as a potential partner. Even Ace, who reacts in the way Angel almost knew she would, feels Angel’s openness and it affects her way of thinking even though her initial reaction was pretty negative.

That this is a story of being fluid vs. fixed is a huge plus for me. I love characters that act outside “their” box. I especially enjoy characters that are willing to look at the status-quo and change if that’s what’s happening to them.

I also want to point out that this is perfect in the way it’s written, meaning the set-up, pacing, and how it ends. It leaves the door open for some more exploration of Angel and Ace’s relationship, which is kind of juicy. But it’s very satisfying in and of itself.

I definitely recommend Turn Me Out even if you’re not into the specifics of sexual/relationship constructs of various sub groups within the lesbian world. It’s an honest and sexy story that everyone can relate to. I can’t wait to read more of these two characters. Or anything by this author.

Heat level: 4-5. Graphic sexual language and scenarios.

Grade: Loved it

Review- SBF Seeking- by LaToya Hankins

SBF Seeking
By LaToya Hankins
Contemporary/ Lesbian/ Chick lit/Coming out/AA
January 22, 2012
Pgs 234
Pub:  JMS Books, LLC
Kindle edition

Four months before her wedding, Yvette Thurman realizes this might be her last chance to have a sexual fling with a white man. But she never thought placing a personal ad would lead her to discover she was a lesbian.

Yvette's small town life in eastern North Carolina never prepared her for the personal journey she undertakes as she struggles to find her heart's path.

Through personal ads and late night visits to an adult bookstore, Yvette learns more about her own personal desires than she ever did when she was engaged to be married. If she embraces her true self, can she find acceptance and love from her family and friends? Or will she be forced to hide who she really is from those she cares about the most?

So this is not really a book I normally read; I usually stick to romances or erotica. I often find chick lit too close to IRL-- been there done that--want to read something different that doesn’t represent my experiences. This is a book written by an African American woman about African American lesbians. I’m neither of those, so I took a risk and bought this one. The blurb both intrigued me and pushed my buttons—starts out with cheating, a usual “oh hell no” for me. But I was curious to see where the author would go with this since it so brazenly sets up what seems like an unrealistic or over-the-top story line.

Yvette is the main protagonist and this story is told by her. It’s basically a telling of her experience as she semi-consciously (in awareness) creates a catalyst for her own growth. Her life is going perfectly, or so it seems. She has a good job that she enjoys and is engaged to Martin, a man who’s madly in love with her. They’ve been together for a long time and are about to be married. For some reason, and I probably have an opinion that differs from other readers, she jeopardizes her relationship by having a fling with a random white guy because it could be her last chance.

The cheating with a white guy thing is interesting to me because there is no set up for the reader that she’s ever been curious or aching or craved to know what it’s like to be with a “white” guy specifically. It’s kind of odd, I think, to wake up one day and decide you want to have an affair with someone of another race you have no connection with just to experience it specifically. I felt she chose that, maybe unconsciously, because it was a way to be forced to look at some dissatisfaction with her relationship with Martin, but in a non-threatening way. It clearly wasn’t a serious attempt at a possible new relationship even though her decision was one she was willing to follow through on if it worked out.

Lots of people do dumb ass things to jeopardize the “perfect” status quo when they are not conscious of their dissatisfaction. Or if they are conscious of it, they don’t have the courage to do something about it. I think she already knew, deep down, it wasn’t going to affect her at her core as maybe having an affair with a black man might have. However, doing so did make her question what she actually feels towards Martin and it’s the cause for a huge change in her life.

As is common with stories more focused on growth, a series of events catapult Yvette into learning different things about herself, especially one that will cause conflict for those who love her. Through a coworker asking, Yvette ends up helping out a lesbian couple move into her apartment building and becomes friends with them. She ends up going out with them to a gay bar and becomes attracted to a girl who keeps looking at her. There’s a lot in between, but after a while, she feels she’s a lesbian and enters that world 150 %. Meaning, she comes out to everyone without too much angst, and studies everything about being a lesbian: how they dress, what they read, music they listen to, etc.

In some ways I read it as Yvette telling the story from outside herself and I didn’t really get a good feel for what all of this means to her, inside her being. She came across to me as too easy going about cheating on Martin and breaking up, and easy about realizing she’s a lesbian and telling everyone. And she didn’t seem too bothered or freaked about the downfall of her first lesbian love. It felt like her story was kept on the surface as maybe it would if retelling and having emotional distance from it.

I’ll be honest, maybe my impression of her is more about me being an older woman. It’s a story that I think in many ways would be much more interesting to a younger woman who can identify with her growth and the coming out process.

Who was an interesting character for me is Linda. I loved Linda. She’s a warm, juicy, real, down to earth woman who helps Yvette navigate being a new lesbian and coming out process as well as guiding her in a more realistic and practical way about the realities of being a lesbian. I loved her advice to Yvette to just be and let it all happen naturally. And while she’s going through her own issues, being part of an interracial couple and that falling apart, she’s real even in that, expressing her hurt and anger. Her vulnerability comes through even though not her story. I also got a better feel for her emotional state than I did for Yvette’s, making her easier for me to relate to. I would love to read a story with her as the main character.

Throughout the story, the importance of having family and good friends to support you through life is a strong theme.

The main negative thing I’d say about this book is the editing. There are numerous typos. Enough that I noticed them throughout the book. It didn’t bother me too much but it some readers might find it an issue.

At any rate, this was a good read.  I think this is the author’s first published book? Not sure. But I’d read more books from this author. I felt it’s a true and interesting depiction of someone coming out as a lesbian with all the nuances and issues come up.

Heat level: 2

Grade: 3-1/2 stars

Review- A Reason, A Season, or A Lifetime by Rayne 2. Marzett

A Reason, A Season, or A Lifetime
by Rayne 2. Marzett
August, 2007
Contemporary/ Lesbian/ African American
Category- 44K - $3.00

Buy it Phaze

A Reason, A Season, or A Lifetime is a first hand look at the fears and desperate misconceptions about love. This is by no means your average love story, and that is very clear as you follow Chrysten Rainer in her quest to figure out how to navigate through the rough waters of love and her budding career as a fashion designer. After losing the one thing in life she longed for, Chrysten must come to terms with not only the loss but also overcome the mourning and move on.

A Reason, A Season, or A Lifetime is not your average romance, it’s more about the journey of one woman as she comes to terms with what she wants out of life and how the women she loves fits into that. It’s a story of growth in which sex and love play a huge part. So this is no traditional love story although it ends up with that. This story is told through Chrys’s lens and it’s her story.

Chrys is a strong, confidant woman who is a fledgling, but savvy, designer and is trying to get a clothing line going. This is her career. She’s likes to keep her independence with the ladies and is a bit of a player. As the story starts, Chrys is in semi committed relationship with Angel, although she does have some favorite girls that she goes to here and there. She reflects about her life and why she doesn’t settle down, but not too much… in the beginning.

Angel dies in a car accident while Chrys is getting it on with another woman and this throws Chrys into a tailspin of self reflection and to some degree, guilt. She loved Angel and after this happens, Chrys spends the next year basically trying to deal with her grief and she doesn’t really get involved with anyone, even for fun.

As her clothing line is getting a lot of buzz and she’s having a major showing, she gets a model off, but hates that she did that. She’s still grappling with her feelings about relationships and what that is to her when her first love from high school, Stephanie, suddenly shows up at her door and they reconnect. It turns out that Steph is pregnant and Chrys decides it’s time to settle down, so she and Stephanie move in together and prepare for the baby.

Chrys then goes through a period of freaking out, feeling claustrophobic and she takes off for a bit planning to find another woman to have sex with. Instead she goes to Angel’s mom and pours her heart out, everything she’s feeling and she goes back home to Steph to ask Steph to marry her.

As I said in the first paragraph this isn’t a traditional romance story, nor is it erotica. It’s more like an account of someone’s life, which I found interesting for what it is.

Chrys at first was a character that I didn’t like. She’s kind of selfish and does as she pleases, often hurting those women that love her by not really thinking about them and what they are feeling. And she makes all kinds of excuses for her behavior. But after Angel dies, she becomes very self reflective and in the end I felt some respect for her.

The story does get a bit emo heavy at times with Chrys kind of going off on tangents about life and love and relationships and it does get a bit bogged down in parts with philosophical musings. At one point I thought this was going the way of too much melodrama with these kinds of musings being expressed:

I tried desperately to shake this feeling off me but found that it wasn't going to budge. Out the clear blue sky I submitted this soliloquy:

"I don't know. I've tried and tried. I pushed her aside for what I think is the last time and right back she comes. I wanted to move on. I wanted to find a love that I could start over with. Someone that I could offer the chances that I denied her so many times. Ohh, but this grave in my chest shows no sign of ever allowing that to happen. It came to pass too soon and over before the wind could blow. Must I forever wallow in the drudgery of the mistaken past? Must I spend eternal nights and days longing for what I can never have? I'm only human. I can't make promises. I can't understand what has no questions and only answers. The time has passed and come again and I have no idea how I'm going to get through it all. I thought that I was over and done with. Now here it is again. Haunting me, looming around my heart only to find no place to rest. I know now that I can not start anew without clearing up the past. That is my hold. Angel is my unfortunate end and I don't really want to let her go."

However, fortunately Chrys moves on and gets over herself towards the end and there’s a really satisfying HEA ending for both Chrys and Stephanie. This one does end with an actual marriage and having a baby. Ending on a high point like that actually saved this book for me.

A Reason, A Season, or A Lifetime is not your average fictional story so I wouldn’t recommend it to someone who’s looking for hot sex and a light love story. However, it is a good book about a personal journey through relationships and sex and is worth to read on that level if you’re into something deeper. Also, there are poems written between chapters that express the feeling behind what’s coming in the next part of the story. They are nicely written, if you’re into poetry.

Sex rating: Orgasmic- there are a few graphically written sex scenes that were pretty hot, although I wouldn’t call this erotica or even erotic romance.

Grade: B+