Movie reviews: A Perfect Ending, I Can't Think Straight, Kiss Me

A Perfect Ending
2012
F/f-/ May-Dec/ Interracial

Rebecca has a very unusual secret, one that not even her best friends know about. The last person on earth she expects to reveal it to is a high priced escort named Paris. What starts as a comedy of errors ends up a uniquely erotic journey. Rebecca's unconventional efforts to find herself are raw, evocative, and often times humorous, but always very real, very human. Sometimes a perfect ending is not what you expect it to be. 

- Written by Soul Kiss Films

You know how you read a book or watch a movie and the story stays with you for days and days and you realize it affected you on a really deep level, this is what A Perfect Ending was for me. It’s gorgeous story both on a human level and on an aesthetic level in how it’s expressed.

There are a crap ton of reviews for this movie, so what I’m going to say about it is how and why it affected me so deeply. The main thing about this movie for me was how beautifully and lovingly it shows human vulnerability and the growth that can happen from a relationship, even a relationship with a complete stranger, and also almost strictly a sexual relationship, in which two people feel totally safe to let themselves open up and heal from personal wounds. It’s also about how we come to terms with what’s important when faced with mortality.

On more practical levels, I love that it featured a middle aged women and a sex worker who is empowered by her choice to be a call girl.

Just for edification, this is not a romance. Nor is it really a lesbian story. Neither of the main characters are lesbians. It’s not about sexual passion either. I do feel this is a love story though and definitely it’s a story about connecting deeply on a human level. But also a warning, ending might disappoint. For me it was more about the ride, the here and now vs forever in what I felt this story was meant to portray.

Rebecca is wealthy middle aged woman who on the surface seems to have it all. And she does-- on the surface. She’s not that unhappy or miserable in general, she just seems to accept the status quo and doesn’t think about her needs or wants too much. There is though, a family secret that has caused her a lot of pain and she cannot get passed it at times.

While out with her best friends, a lesbian couple, she confesses that she’s never felt passion. Nor has she never had an orgasm. This of course shocks her friends who cannot believe it. She further confesses that her marriage is not that great and she rarely has sex. Her friends suggest that maybe she needs a woman to show her what she and her body can feel. They know a madam who runs an agency for call girls and think maybe it would be easier for her if she hired one of those girls to help her with that. She decides to go for it but under the condition that the woman be her own age.

Paris is a young woman who is grieving the loss of her fiancé. She is a call girl by night but an artist by day and she’s definitely not in it for the money only, she’s working out her grief by being a call girl. Maybe it’s her way feel some control about her life during this process. When her older colleague, the one who was supposed to go to Rebecca, asks her to meet Rebecca because she has an emergency, she agrees. When she gets there though, Rebecca is shocked that she ended up with a younger woman, freaks out, and decides not to go through with it. But Paris is very intense and open and accepting and seems to know exactly what Rebecca is about. And Rebecca picks that up. 

Rebecca tries a few more times- getting the older woman second time, whom she decides is so not for her, then asks for Paris again. In 3rd meeting, Paris again tries to seduce her but puts no pressure on Rebecca. Finally, Rebecca decides to go for it and it’s amazing for her.

Here I want to interject that actress Barbara Niven did an amazing job of expressing all those fears of not being appealing or desirable being an older woman with older women body flaws. And kudos to her as an actress, who is a very nice looking woman and has an image to maintain, that she showed her actual physical flaws in this movie. I think that took a lot of courage and added to her actual vulnerability as a character.

The first sex scene is really about Rebecca letting go and trusting. Paris being a much younger, very gorgeous woman has the power in this, but she’s portrayed as sort of an experienced, wise, old soul who really is accepting and understanding. She does feel a connection with Rebecca that is beyond their “business” arrangement, so it’s more for her as well. This connection she feels, maybe because Rebecca is also in a very vulnerable space, helps Paris also let go of her grief in a very intimate way.

In case anyone is wondering—although you can see most of the sex scenes are on youtube—the sex between the women is very loving, soft and even though both are naked- it’s not salacious in any way. In fact, there were moments I felt I didn’t want to watch because it felt like I was intruding on some deeply intimate moments. Not the intimacy of sex alone, but the intimacy of being emotionally raw and open during sex. So if you’d watch for some hot girl on girl sex, this is not the movie.

Other than this, I love how this film was filmed. It has almost a Zen-like feel to it. There are lots of fade in and out scenes with action but no words. Since the two women only meet in the hotel room and don’t talk about their lives with each other, the back story of both women, where they are coming from, is told through most of those silent or brief snippets in between them meeting.

The other characters also added a lot to this film. It’s much more than two women connecting, it’s also about life and love and family from and what that all means for a woman.

All in all this movie grabbed me and I’d definitely recommend it, especially if you’re about two people connecting beyond a sexual orientation or if you’re an older woman who would love a story about having courage to experience new things.

Bonus for this movie is that the actress who played Paris is an out lesbian. Something you don’t see hardly ever in lesbian movies. Mostly it’s straight women playing lesbians. So kudos for getting an actual GLBT person to play that role.

Heat level: 3-4- full nudity and sex scenes, very beautifully and aesthetically filmed. Not salacious in any way.

Grade: 5 Stars

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I Can’t Think Straight (British)
2008
Lesbian/ Multicultural

Adaptation of book by Shamim Sarif
A 2008 romance film adapted from a same name novel about a London-based Jordanian of Palestinian descent, Tala, who is preparing for an elaborate wedding. A turn of events causes her to have an affair and subsequently fall in love with another woman, Leyla, a British Indian. 

- Written by Shamim Sarif

I have another book written by this author of the book this story is based off of that I’ve yet to read, so I decided to watch this film instead of that one.

What I loved about this film is that this is a love story that happens between two people from very different backgrounds that happens despite familial, cultural, political and generational conflicts.

Both Tala and Leyla are young women caught between two worlds. They are both living in England, although Tala goes back and forth between Jordan and England. They’ve been brought up exposed to western culture, but both have homes and parents that try to keep their own traditional homeland culture alive. This is one of the main conflicts for both of them and also maybe what helps them understand each other even though of different cultural backgrounds.

They meet just by chance as Leyla’s boyfriend is a friend of Tala. Tala is on her 4th wedding planning, having walked out on the first 3 fiancés just before the wedding. Tala is rather rebellious and being from a wealthy family, her whims and flightiness are somewhat tolerated.

Leyla is a lot more deep and serious about life. She’s a Muslim in her heart, mind and belief, but she doesn’t always go to prayer with her family. She’s also struggling with the contradictions of being a woman growing up in a western culture while dealing with her mother who is very strong in trying to keep their Indian culture alive. This especially becomes an issue when she comes out to her family.

Both women clash at first as Tala, who grew up as a Palestinian Christian Arab, argues that religion and belief are bogus, which kind of pisses Leyla off. But slowly they come together and become good friends and find themselves attracted to each other both romantically and sexually.

Of course, as with many romances between women when one is currently with a man, the main problem between them becomes that Tala is getting married. In this case, I was rather surprised that Tala, who seems to be the more open as one who bucks the system in many ways, feels very strongly about not coming out and won’t defy her family’s culture. She argues with Leyla that Leyla doesn’t get how hard it would be to do that with her family and in Jordan, where the man she’s to marry is from.

On the other hand, this affair pushes Leyla internally to decide that she can’t or won’t hide who she is to her family and friends anymore. So until Tala is willing to accept who she is, Leyla will not see her.

I’ll be honest, I wasn’t feeling the romance so much between these two women even though it’s shown they have had attractions to women in the past. Somehow it felt a bit too insta-love for me, which is maybe why this film didn’t affect me other than I love stories that include characters of other cultures and in which those cultures are part of the story. I think maybe it’s also because I wasn’t feeling Tala as a character. She was a little too superficial and a bit cocky for me for most of the film and I felt her not really that serious about Leyla.

But I did feel that Leyla is really in love with Tala and she, as a character, made the film for me.

Other than that, I felt the film didn’t shy away from the truths or realities of cultural and political clashes. I feel some people might be offended by some of what is expressed, however, I took all at face value and as a true portrayal of what is real for people of those cultures.

I’d definitely recommend this if you’re looking for something a bit different culturally. But as a romance goes, it was just OK.

Heat level: 2 – some sex, no nudity

Grade: 3 ½ Stars

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Kyss Mig -Kiss Me (Swedish)
2011
Lesbian/ bi?

Young woman engaged to be married finds herself in an affair with her stepmother's lesbian daughter.

This was one of the better lesbian movies I saw during my marathon. And I guess from others in the lesbian community they think it’s one of the better ones as well.

Elizabeth and Lassa are an older couple who are about to be married. Both have older, independent children. Lasse had a contentious divorce and his daughter Mia still feels angry with him about what happened. Consequently, she hasn’t visited often. Elizabeth has a grown daughter who is an out lesbian and in a relationship and lives nearby.

At the pre-wedding party, all of them meet for the first time and family drama ensues.

Mia (played by Ruth Vega Fernandez) is sulky and cranky because her father isn’t spending the time with her that she wants. He’s always busy with some job thing. She also shows a pissed/sad face whenever she sees Frida, Elizabeth’s daughter. Frida is light and fun and both Mia’s brother and fiancé are enjoying with Frida. I will say that actress Ruth Vega Fernandez has the perfect sad/pissed off look that worked here.

Anyway, as the days go on, Mia, who is an architect with her fiancé, is to design and extension on a lake house that Lasse and Elizabeth have bought. Lasse was supposed to meet them, but leaves Mia alone with both Elizabeth and Frida, which pisses her off and freaks her out. All of her interactions with Frida show she’s not too happy with this.

However, one night at the cabin, she follows Frida who is out walking in the woods. They barely talk, but then she suddenly kisses Frida. She acts freaked that she did that, but at the same time both women get sexual fairly quickly after that. Of course, as the days go on and they start really falling in love, Frida basically states she will not be a fling for Mia and cuts it off. This forces Mia to confront what she really feels and how far she’s willing to go to be with Frida.

Of course, this new development messes with Mia’s plans for marriage and a lot of pain for all characters in this story happens due to this new love between these women. I felt it was dealt with in a realistic way. I guess there is no easy way to follow your heart when it’s going against everyone you love and the convenience of life at times. But this was one of the better parts of the film.

The only negative thing I will say is that like so many of the lesbian movies I watched these last few weeks, insta-love seemed to be a thing here. I wish there was more of a build-up to why Mia would be attracted to Frida and why Frida would fall so madly in love with Mia that she leaves her long-time girlfriend. There really wasn’t much between them that did show that.

However, what saves this movie is that in the end, I really believed these women want each other badly. Enough that both risk so much to go for it.

For those wondering, this is not really a straight girl falls for a girl and discovers she’s a lesbian. Mia did have a love affair with a woman in the past but felt it freaked her out. So it’s more like lesbian in the closet finally having the guts to be true to herself.

Anyway… this is a definite recommend to watch. I can’t really believe this is the first Swedish lesbian film. Seems like the stereotype that Europeans are more open about stuff like this is not always true.

Heat level: 3-4 Nude sex scene, done showing lots of passion.

Grade: 4 ½ Stars

Review- Cream by Christiana Harrell

Cream
By Christiana Harrell
Aug 31, 2013
Contemporary/Lesbian/Stud/Romance/Erotica/African American
230 Pgs
Pub-Self
Kindle Edition

Cream, an androgynous beauty, knows what it’s like to be abandoned, broke, and used. Left to the state by her parents and taken under the wing of her selfish foster mother, Cream sets her focus on one thing: money. She dives head first into the exotic lifestyle of stripping. Starting out in gentlemen clubs, drama seems to follow her wherever she goes. Instead of facing the turmoil, she moves on to the next city, causing more chaos than what she left behind.

She thinks she has life all figured out until she crosses paths with Payton, a daddy’s girl with lots of cash and a lust for women. Payton makes her learn things about herself that she never saw possible and with her new discovery comes a big change in her look and personality.

Cream is at the top of her game, surrounded by money and beautiful women. Then, one wild night forces her to discover yet another truth about herself and face the reality of her lifestyle. Will she continue to dwell in her unstable comfort zone? Or, will she finally open her eyes?

If I could ever call a book a reader whisperer, this would be it for me. Cream spoke to me in so many awesome and amazing ways. It’s such a raw and powerfully positive story of growth and acceptance. Cream as a character is also one of the most intense, real and dynamic female leads I’ve read in a long time.

What I loved so much about Cream is that she’s written as someone having a nice combination of savvy, rough street smarts and innocence. It’s that underlying innocent part of her, the part she’s managed to keep even with all the negative obstacles she’s had to deal with that helps her change and grow once she allows that part of her to emerge. That’s not to say she doesn’t have a lot of flaws and isn’t a nasty shit at times. But this is what makes her an interesting, complex character.

I also got off on how the author wrote this book. The way this story is written: language (colloquial), pacing, character development, were all spot on for me. The growth of Cream is slowly done and we get to see her change as she learns from her relationships and experiences. It’s a natural progression and I liked that it wasn’t rushed or that she suddenly had an epiphany that wasn’t natural to her character.

That the author wrote a character who works in the sex industry but isn’t being controlled, or doing it for “good” reasons, was a huge plus for me. Cream chooses it after that first night. She did have a crappy childhood. And she ends up stripping because she was pimped out by someone who should have protected her. But she embraces it, becomes the best stripper, and uses it to her advantage. She also enjoys it and makes no excuses, nor does she blame the world for it. And shockingly, she stays unaffected by the sexual nature of it, never having any attractions or sexual encounters.

One of Cream’s worst characteristics is being unable to get close to people and running all the time. She seemed to be missing the empathy chip for a good part of this book and I wondered if she’s actually just out of touch with her feelings, or if she really feels as emotionally cold towards others as she acts. But it’s clear after a while it’s a survival technique. It’s also what throws her into meeting new people and having experiences that push her out of that. 

Of course, both good and unsavory characters enter her life. And I will say that what was appealing to me was that there were no stereotypical characters. People who you’d think would try and take advantage of Cream don’t and those who you’d think would normally be nice, aren’t. I loved that.

This story is about Cream, but several other characters are very compelling as well. Payton is an interesting character in that she starts Cream on the road to growth, albeit, unknowingly. She’s the impetus for Cream to see that she has a lot of talent and helps her career flourish.  She’s also the one who turns Cream on to women, suggesting she’s not just a lesbian, but a stud. At first it felt like Payton would be a very positive influence on Cream in all aspects, not just her career, but things didn’t go as I thought.

Then there is Tasia. Tasia is the antithesis of pretty much everyone Cream has met. Tasia, like Cream, has been abused on several levels, but has kept her heart, hope and humanity. Even when she’s so clearly treated like shit from her fiancé and by her best friend, she still manages to keep hope that one day she will find love. This is not to say she’s a doormat. Like Cream though, she’s managed to keep some innocence locked away but it’s more on the surface for her.

Tasia and Cream meet mainly due to a betrayal, but more so because Tasia looks very much like the only “friend” Cream had ever had and probably the only person she had any feelings of love towards. Although Cream tries her usual shtick with Tasia, keeping things at a distance, something about Tasia’s vulnerability and positivity worms its way into Cream’s psyche and slowly breaks down her hard core emotional wall. Tasia also has an easy going, loving, but non-threatening or needy way about her that sparks something in Cream wherein for the first time in her life she finds herself opening up to another person and caring about their well-being.

I know there are some negative aspects to this book. There were some editing issues and well, I know intellectually it’s not subject matter for everyone; it represents a fairly specific world. Also, some (lesbians) might not like that Tasia’s sexual orientation is not really clear and it’s written more as she loves Cream vs being attracted to women. And also for my taste, even Cream, while clearly into women and not ever having an attraction to men, won’t commit to stating she’s a lesbian. However, I got so sucked into the story and the characters, I didn’t notice those things or they didn’t bother me. 

I would love to read another book by this author.

Heat level: 4-5- some graphic sexual situations, but more tell than show. But graphic language used.

Grade: 5 Stars

Review- Love and Devotion by Jove Belle

Love and Devotion
By Jove Belle
Dec 17, 2013
Lesbian/Contemporary/Romance/Friends to lovers/Small town
240 pgs
Publisher: Bold Strokes Books
Kindle Edition

KC Hall loves her family, her small East Texas town, and her best friend, Emma Reynolds. All of that takes a backseat when her lover beckons. Lonnie is blond, beautiful, and willing. She’s also married and a lifelong friend of KC’s mama.

KC knows the affair is a bad idea, but she just can’t help herself. When presented with the lush landscape of Lonnie’s body, KC subscribes to the philosophy of “orgasm first, think later.” Unfortunately, a secret that big is impossible to keep in a close-knit community where everybody knows everybody else’s business. The scandal would hurt her entire family.

Emma is KC’s exception, the one woman she loves enough to not have sex with. When Emma confesses that she’s loved KC since high school, KC is terrified. One wrong move and she could lose Emma completely.

Is she willing to let her family pay the price for her good time? Or will she turn to Emma to discover the true meaning of love and devotion?

I have read several of Jove Belle’s books and I’ve enjoyed them. This one looked appealing to me so I went for it. It’s a good story. Definitely a good friends to lovers story. However, even though I enjoyed it for the most part, it seemed to drag and felt like it went on and on forever. I feel that it was mostly due to how drawn out this story was from the time Emma lets it be known she has more than “just friends” feelings for KC and KC realizing that she’s always loved Emma.

For some, how this book starts out might be off-putting. KC is having an affair with her mother’s married best friend Lonnie. That’s a no-no for several obvious reasons. But the way it’s written, I was intrigued and not really bothered because as the story progresses there is character growth and understanding of the negative consequences to everyone involved. And also, this is a more complex story involving several characters; it’s not just about those two and the sneaking around.

I’ll start with KC. In her career life she’s totally together and on top of things. She got her master’s degree and has a great job that offers her a good living with a flexible schedule. She lives with Emma, her best friend from high school, and as far as their relationship goes, they are very close friends only. From KC’s side, Emma is the one person who grounds her and she feels comfort with when they are together. They actually sleep in the same bed together and cuddle, which I thought kind of weird if they are trying to keep things platonic, but manage to keep things from going further.

KC is also very close to her family and takes care when issues happen with her younger sister. She’s community oriented in that she goes to church with her family every Sunday and follows all the rules and expectations of being in a small community where everyone knows each other…on the surface.  Her main flaw though, and it’s one that is cause for a lot of grief between her, Emma, her sisters, and Lonnie, is that she’s flighty and irresponsible when it comes to her love life and sexual desires. This is where she has no scruples, nor any common sense. And the fact that she’s having an affair with her mother’s friend and a married woman is not sitting well with anyone. However, Lonnie has her hooked and KC finds it hard to break away from her even though she knows it’s wrong.

As this story is mostly about KC, meaning she’s the center of it, Emma is not really as developed or shown to the reader. All we get to know about Emma is that she’s always loved KC as more than just a friend and that she is will not agree to be with KC until KC gets really clear she wants to be with Emma. This, even though she wants KC more than anything. I have to respect her on that. She knows what’s been going on between KC and Lonnie and she knows that even though KC is professing her love and desire to be with her, KC will still not commit totally.

And this is the crux of why this story dragged. KC admits to herself that she wants Emma and she gets possessive and jealous when Emma meets up with a former lover, but she’s unwilling to completely break it with Lonnie even though she knows for Lonnie she is only desired for booty call. Even at that, it’s never a sharing or exchange of giving. Lonnie never satisfies KC, it’s only about her, which kind of pisses KC off. She’s also not clear that she can commit given her history. What I felt could have been cleared up fairly quickly got drawn out due to KC’s being wishy-washy.

On the plus side of that, it’s good to show the natural progression of character growth and love in a relationship, which the author did superbly here. We get to see KC’s process and how she goes from existing for lust to discovering that love is more worthy of her energy.

Other than that, there are a lot of interesting characters and I did enjoy the small town feel even if I don’t believe a small Texas town or church in a small town would be so accepting of the gay population like they are in the one portrayed here. But I did like that KC’s and Emma’s families accepted them as lesbians and as a couple.

I definitely recommend Love and Devotion if you’re really into the small town, church going, family oriented type of story in which everyone has a happy ending. And also if you like the friends to lovers story. It excelled on that point.

Heat level: 3 – some graphic sex, but scattered throughout the story.

Grade: 3 ½ Stars

Review- Safe Passage by Kate Owen

Safe Passage
By Kate Owen
Feb 5, 2014
Contemporary/Lesbian/Romance/Mystery
116 pages
Pub: Less Than Three Press
Kindle Edition

While doing renovation on the old New Orleans home inherited from her great aunt, Jules discovers an old safe filled with letters written in French—and code. Enlisting the aid of a local French teacher, the beautiful Gen, Jules slowly begins to learn the truth of her great grandfather's death …

Safe Passage is a cute, fun story with very likable characters who gel nicely. It’s also a mystery of sorts.

Both Jules and Gen are instructors at a school for girls. Both have been eying each other but have kept quiet about it. Jules is an out lesbian at the school, but Gen is more mysterious and doesn’t give away that she’s into women.

They both come together when Jules needs Gen to translate some old documents she’s found that are written in French. Of course, it comes out fairly quickly that Gen is into women and they get together without too much ado.

Both characters are fun and interesting. The author infused a lot of humor and light banter between them, adding to my enjoyment of the book.

To be honest, it’s an easy going love story with no real drama, which is kind of refreshing. I wouldn’t want to read books like this all the time because a little tension and drama is good. However, it’s a welcome change once in a while to have two people click and go for it without constant issues coming in that drag a story just to create faux obstacles for the couple to face and get over. 

As far as the mystery part goes, I think I was expecting a bit more on it. It’s really not that developed and the reveal wasn’t a big wow. What was more important I guess is that the women have something to work on together or have an excuse to interact with an outside objective so they can get to know each other.

But I did like that part of the mystery involved her aunt who was an interesting character, and also, that she was involved in a mix race love story, something scandalous for her time.

What I ultimately felt about this story was that it could be the precursor to these two characters being in a detective series. They work well together, they are great at digging up clues and have good chemistry.

Bottom line, Safe Passage is the perfect, light feel good book to read between two weightier and more serious books.

Heat level: 2- some sex, nothing too graphically written

Grade: 4 stars for emotional, entertainment value
            3 ½ Stars for lack of development in either romance or mystery

Review- Love Relived by Monique Thomas

Love Relived
By Monique Thomas
Feb 4, 2013
Contemporary/Lesbian/Romance/AA
198 pgs
Kindle version

Photographer Mahogany Williams has beauty, brains and success in San Francisco. California. Knowing the right people had launched her career into the limelight and she was enjoying the benefits of it all. When her Nana beomes confined to a wheel chair, Mahogany goes back home (New York) to care for her . While doing so she also tries to undo the pain that caused her to leave so many years ago. Cheryl James is a quiet sensible and known to be "too serious" woman. She enjoys her job working as a head educator at the famed Museum of Natural history. It is the theme of history, however that caused old feelings to resurface when she finds out that Mahogany is coming back into town. Will she be able to handle it after the bitter way things were left between them? Can forgiveness be enough? Can love be revisited?

I wanted to love this book. I had a good feeling going in to it that I would love it. I like the idea that two people who’ve shared a lot between them, but who for various reasons could not be together, get a second chance to explore what’s between them. So I was hoping this would be a warm, loving story about two people that meet up after years apart and fall in love all over again. Unfortunately there were several issues with this story that made it a less than positive reading experience for me.

I’ll start with the most glaring thing about this book that agitated me. This is just a badly edited book. I think I’m more forgiving of bad editing with self-published books than many readers. But by midway into this book I found myself focusing more on the mistakes than the story, which tells me this was worse than the usual. Or maybe I’ve just read too many crappily edited self-pubbed books these days and this was the needle that broke the camel’s back. Whatever the reason, it had a HUGELY negative impact on how I felt about this book because my bad mood about it amplified other issues that might not have bothered me as much if I wasn’t irritated by technical issues.

Just a few Examples. (I bolded or added missing words or punctuation in brackets to show mistakes:

Periods in speech quotes:

“She is fine baby, just fine.” Mamma Hanna interjected.

“I wasn’t being sarcastic. I have been hun gry for a long time and I am starving.” Cheryl replied nonchalantly.

I wanted to tell you one more time so you could understand.” Mahogany admitted.

“Just tell her that you don’t like it that way Mama Hanna. She is there to help you.” Cheryl pleaded

Comma issues:

Mahogany turned around, to see that her Nanna had come into the dining room. “ Nana did you need something?”

When they did [,]she realized that there hadn’t been wearing much underneath her clothes.


Missing words, wrong words, other missing punctuation:

“The last time we were in this parking lot I told you that I love [you] and left it up to you what we should do.

“What do we do know?

“I want you to.”

Thinking about her was the reason that she could not concentrated on her job.

Mahogany tried to shut her brain of but she found it difficult.

Cheryl opened it [. , or and] she stepped to the side so that Mahogany could enter first. A light came on in automatically in the small hallway.

“Where are you going?” Cheryl asked. “I was just trying to give you some room.” Mahogany managed to stammer out. “Don’t you think that you have put enough space between us?” “I’m sorry Cheryl. I never meant to…” “Shhh,[”] Cheryl silenced her, “We will talk but right now that is not what I want to do.”

“Is the water to hot?” Cheryl asked.

Funky sentences, writing or wording:

She let her hands explore Mahogany’s back and they found their way to the ass that was being sculpted by the fabric of the skirt.

She brushed her teeth and entered the shower in the homemade sauna, she let the water run over her head.


Next up, and this is rather unfortunate and a matter of personal taste that maybe won’t affect many readers, this story features a push-pull relationship. Push-pull relationships drive me insane and I don’t find them entertaining IRL or in reading. I also don’t believe in the long term viability of them unless both parties make a drastic change because I feel they are more about obsession than true love. I guess it can happen, but I find the interim so annoying. This is pretty much most of the book.

Cheryl has wanted Mahogany since they were teens. They got together when they were very young before they each had a chance to know who they were as individuals and how they each felt about their own sexuality. It’s understandable that both had a lot to learn. The main issue is that Cheryl has understood that she’s a lesbian, whereas Mahogany is not that clear and is unwilling to really look it for various reasons.

Most of the rest of the story, including flashbacks, is about Cheryl being hurt and angry that Mahogany can’t or won’t be what she needs and getting on her case about it every time they have some communication, and Mahogany making excuses or ignoring or telling Cheryl to leave it be.

That they finally work it out is great. After all that they went through, to finally reach that point where they’re both on the same page should be very satisfying. However, for me, the author didn’t quite make me believe these two will manage long term. And this is mainly because there was no real explanation as to why Mahogany finally came around to really getting that she loves Cheryl as more than just a friend.

Having sex when you’ve been close friends doesn’t exactly turn a relationship into a love story. Mahogany has a great career and is content in that, but no one has really sparked her interest romantically. And she’s going home out of familial duty. None of those are reasons to come to understand finally, after years, that you’re in love someone vs just loving them from having a shared history. She didn’t even go back to specifically work it out with Cheryl, when, if really she loved her, that should have been one of the main reasons. Even after figuring out she loves Cheryl, she’s rather reticent, giving up easily when Cheryl rebukes her. So I wasn’t feeling her in a strong way where Cheryl was concerned. Away from Cheryl though, she’s a likable, dynamic character.

And I was bothered a bit by Cheryl seemingly coming from a place of “you owe me for all that pain and I deserve to control how this relationship is going to work now” feeling. I get that, I really do. After years of being put off she doesn’t like that she’s expected to just let Mahogany walk back into her life without some kind of proof that Mahogany is not just coming around because it’s convenient. But it doesn’t exactly inspire the warm, fuzzy feelings of falling in love all over again.

Mama Hanna is really the best part of this book. She’s that wise family matriarch that that understands that life isn’t always perfect but that love is worth fighting for. Really, if it wasn’t for her, Cheryl and Mahogany would probably still be going back and forth or avoiding.

So bottom line, I think I could have looked at this story in a more positive light had there not been so many grammatical and writing errors, which set me off right away. Also, if the author somehow would have focused more on what was positive between the characters vs the constant negative drama I think I might have had a better feeling overall.

Heat level: 3 some graphically written sexual scenarios

Grade: 2 ½  Stars

Review- Hush Now by L.A. Green

Hush Now 
By L.A. Green

Sept. 14, 2012
Historical/Lesbian/Interraci/Romance
216 pgs Pub: Dog Ear Publishing

When Rebecca Montgomery, daughter of wealthy plantation owner Grafton Montgomery, falls in love with Ruth, a slave, her life is turned upside down. Their journey of self-discovery takes place in a historical period of the imagination-one filled with vibrant characters, intrigue, danger, and the underlying theme of hope.
A wealthy plantation owner's daughter falls in love with a beautiful slave women and their lives are turned upside down...this is a love story about secrets that might never have been told.

When I was reading another mid 1800’s southern romance, which was between two white women on opposing sides and ideology during the civil war, I internally asked the same question the authors of this book sort of did. I wondered what if the daughter of a wealthy plantation owner actually fell in love with one the female slaves? I thought it would be an intriguing story but one that would have to be told, for me, without abuse of privilege or the main POV being the privileged character. Hush Now comes very close to that story I wanted to read. It’s a beautiful love story between two women stuck in a time and circumstance that makes it virtually impossible to be together.

Rebecca is a strong woman who is all about running her father’s plantation while he’s ill instead of being a proper Southern lady and looking for a husband. Unconventionally, she likes to wear men’s riding breeches as she rides around the plantation checking on it and makes sure the overseer is acting properly. She considers herself and her father more enlightened and progressive as far as slave ownership goes in the South and treats her father’s slaves with more respect than most of her station. Due to this, her family is considered by many in town as slave lovers, which is cause for problems to them at times.

What I love about Rebecca is that during the course of her growing relationship with Ruth she starts to really get it. She goes past the “I treat my slaves well” attitude to really understanding  her privilege, getting how wrong it is to enslave other human beings and trying to do something about it. She also doesn’t abuse her privilege when it comes to Ruth even though it would be easy to do so. Not only that, she’s conscious of that power and takes great pains to be careful she doesn’t let it take over even when her love and desire to be with Ruth is so intense. And even though she loves Ruth so deeply, ultimately she’s willing to sacrifice her own desires to do what’s right.

Ruth is also an interesting character, who I fell in love with. Too often in interracial love stories, the POC POV is not that developed. One thing I really wanted in reading a story like this is a strong representation of the POC POV. The authors mostly deliver on this point although I felt there could have been more about her. Or let’s say more about her life and who she was before being bought by the Montgomerys. I did get a good feel for who she is though. Ruth’s desires for freedom and seeing her family again who have escaped up north, and fearing really loving Rebecca due to the huge disparity in their social stations, drives a lot of how she reacts to Rebecca trying to prove her love.

Ruth is intelligent, well read—reads Shakespeare with Rebecca---, and is proud. Very telling is that she consciously dumbs down her speech and uses subservient body language to survive, which is painful to read. On this level, the authors didn’t shy away from showing the harsh realities of being enslaved in the South during this time. What I loved about her is that even though she has been treated as property, humiliated, separated from her family, and lives in fear that maybe Rebecca is just using her as she’s been used by white owners in the past, she still dares to allow herself to feel the love she feels for Rebecca. It’s an even bigger risk her loving and being with Rebecca than for Rebecca, so I had a stronger feeling for her.

What shines through this whole story is the love the both women share for each other. They have nothing but secret glances and stolen moments together and yet they manage to express and share their deep love and need of each other. It’s both beautiful and heartbreaking at the same time.

One thing outside the love story that I enjoyed was the plot twist that creates an opening for Rebecca find a way for them to be together. Not sure if it’s something that could have actually have happened, but I can imagine gays during this time period did such things in order to exist and be with their loves. For Ruth and Rebecca it’s the only way even though it pains Rebecca that they still have to live with the pretense that Ruth is a servant.

In a way, even though the ending is unconventional for a romance, it fits with who the characters are. It’s maybe the only choice they could have made. Would love to read a sequel to find out how it all works out.

Other than Ruth and Rebecca’s romance, there are a lot of other characters that add some interesting and offbeat elements to this story. Chet, Rebecca’s long time beau offers some lightness and humor and plays a huge role in how things turn out for the women. And then there’s Teenie, the main house cook and caregiver to the Montgomery family. She’s always in the spotlight as she’s loved by everyone. However, her lightness and humor and that she’s loved but still has the status of slave is a constant reminder that this story is set in the south.

The only thing negative I’d say about this book is along technical lines. There were issues for me with tense and POV changes in the same paragraph. It wasn’t enough to hurt my experience, but was something that jarred me out of the story at times.

I would definitely read a sequel to this story. Somehow it felt as if the women were just on the precipice or beginning of their journey together, one that didn’t quite ever give them a chance to really fulfill their love for each other and it’s only natural after getting so invested in them that I’d want the story to go on. 

Heat Level- 2 some sex scenes written in mild language.

Grade: Really liked it

Review- Bella Key by Scarlet Chastain

Bella Key

By Scarlet Chastain

April 30th 2013

Contemporary/f/f/Multicultural (Hispanic/white)/Fluid sexuality

12.8K words

75 pgs

Pub: Evernight Publishing

Maddie Jacobs must be crazy. At least that’s what her mother thinks. Professionally, she’s confident and secure; personally, she’s a hot mess. Not even a marriage proposal from a man who adores her can quell her search for something more.
In need of an escape, Maddie flees to Key West’s most southern island, Bella Key, to rest and recharge at Casa Bonita. She almost gives up on the weekend retreat when the Bed & Breakfast is closed for repairs until Sunny Rojas, the inn owner, extends an offer of friendship, sweet tea and a room. Still reeling from a breakup with her longtime partner, Sunny is thankful for the diversion from her own broken heart.
The arrival of a fierce storm forces the women’s emotional journey to a head and leads them into each other’s arms. But can Maddie throw her hang-ups to the wind and go with her heart? The magic of Bella Key teaches her that passion cannot be placed neatly into boxes labeled right and wrong, because love knows no boundaries.

This is such cute, well-written and erotic story and it gave me the warm fuzzies all over. You know when you meet someone and you immediately feel so comfortable that none of the usual first meeting guarding comes up? You feel very relaxed and as if whatever you do or say will be fine, you can be yourself? This is the kind of relationship that Maddie and Sunny have. I loved it!

The whole set up on how these two women meet and why Maddie would be there was totally believable and didn’t feel contrived. Right away the women are very comfortable with each other, easily chatting and acting as if they’ve known each other for years.

Maddie comes across as someone who is somewhat vulnerable even though she has a high powered job. She wants to end it with the “perfect” guy on paper and just wants a few days to chill and think things over.  

Sunny is a warm, friendly person who welcomes Maddie with open arms, making her feel at ease right away. And she calls Maddie Chica in an endearing and familiar way even though she’s just met her, which I liked. She also doesn’t shy away from being who she is, letting Maddie know that her last partner was a woman when it comes up in conversation.

Even though they’ve just met, the women slip into a sweet sexual thing like right away. But it was written realistically from both POVs. Maddie doesn’t angst about her first time with a woman, but also doesn’t feel totally comfortable as it’s something new for her. All those thoughts about ramifications do run through her head.  Sunny lets her figure it out without putting anything on her about it even though she wants her to stay and wants to keep something going.

Even better was that these two women work things out pretty quickly without a bunch of drama. There’s something so refreshing about two people clicking and simply enjoying each other without the usual awkward uneasiness about what’s going on and so on.

Just also wanted to say that for such a short story, it’s a perfect package. The writing, the pacing of the story, how it starts, how it ends, it’s very feel good. And it’s sexy!

Heat Level- 3- sensually written, but not too graphic-- sex scenes

Grade- Really liked it

Review- House of Clouds by K.I. Thompson

House of Clouds

By K.I. Thomson

October 2007

Lesbian/ Historical Civil War/Romance

Pgs 384

Publisher: Bold Strokes Books

A sweeping saga of an impassioned romance set amidst the upheaval of a nation under siege and a way of life threatened with destruction.

The American Civil War creates enemies of lifelong friends and allies of strangers, but no relationship is more unlikely than that of a passionate Northern Unionist and a loyal Virginia sympathizer. Actress and Northerner Jordan Colfax is hired by Allan Pinkerton to spy on behalf of the Union. When she meets Confederate sympathizer, Laura St. Clair, whose father is military aide to Jefferson Davis, the perfect opportunity presents itself. But when the truth about Jordan's real intentions are discovered, their growing love is put to the ultimate test - the result of which could mean the difference between life and death. Can a Southern belle and a Yankee spy overcome their differences or will divided loyalties keep them apart?

From Tidewater Virginia to Washington, D.C., passion and betrayal converge in Civil War Richmond.

I don’t exactly know where to start in expressing my feelings about this book. I enjoyed much of it and yet there were lots of moments in which I felt conflicted. I think the main problem for me is that this book didn’t seem to know what it wanted to be. It wants to be a romance, however, the romance was so drawn out with too many separations, misunderstandings, and focus on external events that it lost its steam many times. It also tries to be a Civil War drama with the author spending a lot of book time on the specifics of the social/political issues of that time. This part suffers due to returning the focus on the romance towards the end, with things left unsaid or not finished.

The romance: the two main protagonists, Jordan and Laura, meet through both their brothers being best friends and classmates at West Point. Right away both Jordan and Laura notice each other, but are initially put off by each other’s opposing viewpoints on the current political situation. Jordan has no qualms about dissing the Southern way of life as far as owing slaves, which of course puts Laura’s back up. Laura feels defensive of her family’s heritage and Southern culture. So while they feel an attraction and want to be around each other, they are leery of getting too close.

Due to a series of events: Jordan working as an actress near Laura’s home, plus the fact that she’s been recruited to spy and gather information to help the Union—urged to get closer to Laura’s family who are in contact with Jefferson Davis-- and Laura getting very sick needing some help, she and Laura end up spending a few weeks together. Of course, while this is going on the attraction between them grows despite differences.

On this point I really liked how the author slowly built up their attraction. Internally, neither women know what to call what they feel; it’s alien to them because it goes beyond what friends should feel. This is done very realistically for the time period I felt.  Unfortunately, just as they reach a point where an acknowledgment that this is something more that each have been afraid to say out loud, they are kept apart for various reasons, only meeting briefly in what are acrimonious moments until the last part of the book when the focus starts in again on the romance.

One thing that stuck in my mind, and I don’t know how women would have really interacted then, is that I felt it strange that no one, not Jordan’s father, nor Laura’s family who hated Jordan, questioned why each of them would go to such lengths and act in questionable ways where the other was involved. They both explain it away all the time as “she’s my friend.” Maybe female friendships were such in those days that it was normal for friends to act in ways that today would cause someone to wonder what’s actually going on between them.

Laura: Out of all the characters in this story Laura has the most growth and she’s the most complex character even though on the surface she doesn’t stand out as strongly as Jordan does. And she, out of all, has the most malleable mindset, learning and changing her viewpoint from events that happen as life goes on. She starts out of course angry, as most of the South, that the North wants to impose its ideology on them. She defends her family’s ownership of slaves saying they treat their slaves well even if she has a niggling suspicion they are not. However, when she learns about and opens her eyes to the truth of many things she’s been conveniently ignoring to keep the status quo, she does change her mindset even if begrudgingly at times.  And she stays steadfastly loyal to Jordan even after being betrayed.

Jordan: Initially Jordan seems to be the stronger, more dynamic character. She’s not shy, expresses her beliefs to anyone and has guts to be an independent woman, not living the typical social norms that women were expected to live. She’s appalled by slavery and can’t understand how Laura can even think it’s OK to own people. Yet her attraction to Laura is such that she’s willing to look beyond that and try to form a close relationship. She risks her life to spy for the Union so she’s initially portrayed as an honorable and upright person.

The issue I had about Jordan is that ultimately she’s not that honorable. She feels bad on some level that she has all these strong feelings for Laura while she’s using Laura and her family’s hospitality to gather info on Confederate activity. But then disses Laura, mistakenly thinking that Laura betrayed her and not believing her when she states otherwise. Finding out that Laura didn’t betray her she then risks her own life, Laura’s life, friends’ lives, and so many people working for the Underground Railroad for what I felt were utterly selfish reasons.

And this is where I talk about the bigger picture. If the author hadn’t spent so much time on the social/political issues of the civil war, maybe what Jordan did wouldn’t have bothered me as much; it would have had a different context. But what was going on during this time period is expressed in intricate detail from many viewpoints through characters’ actions and words: slaves, free black people, leaders, Southern plantation owners, abolitionists, Lincoln, etc. giving a fairly realistic overall view, or so I felt. This increased my investment into what’s going on with the secondary characters as much as the main characters and how Laura and Jordan’s actions affected and are affected by them. They don’t live in a bubble.

Since the author didn't spare anything on how slaves were actually treated, it showed that even though Jordan is progressive in her thinking and therefore “good” vs the "evil" South, her privilege in doing what she did was glaringly clear comparatively, adding to my discomfort about her.

I’m not saying this was a completely problematic book. I enjoyed it overall. It’s a long book and the fact that I read it in a fairly short amount of time for me- slowest reader ever-- says a lot. It is engaging, the storytelling well done, and I liked that the author included many interesting characters as well as some action and history. However, as a romance it suffered. And the ending was very weird. What happened? We only get Laura’s perspective from the prologue, and it’s all about her and visiting her family home 10 years after she set up life in the north. There’s nothing about her and Jordan, or what happened to pretty much everyone else in the book that got a lot of book time.

Heat level: 2- one sex scene, not graphically written

Grade: Liked it.