Review- Out on the Sound by R. E. Bradshaw

Out On the Sound
By R. E. Bradshaw
Aug 22, 2010
Contemporary/ Lesbian
292 pgs in PB

Buy it Amazon

If you like a good story with laughter, tears and suspense then this is the book for you. In her late thirties, Decky Bradshaw was set for life. She had an incredibly lucky life up to this point, excluding the brief marriage to her son's father. She had a great job, plenty of money and a very comfortable existence. Decky figured if someone ever came along that tickled her fancy she'd know. She never thought for one second it would be a woman. Neither did her mother. Follow Decky as she finds new love and deals with her, "Tennessee Williams in drag," overly dramatic, southern mother, Lizzie, and the hurricane of events she brings.

Where to start, where to start. This was a long, long book. However, I finished it, so that’s a pretty good sign.

I bought this book because it’s a coming out story with older characters. Unfortunately, almost every coming out cliché was in this book. It was almost like a “look at me, I’m so gay” coming out story. And it includes name dropping of almost every well-known gay celebrity, musician and author to make sure that we all know how gay the characters are.

I don’t want to slam this book totally. I liked the author’s voice. The writing itself flowed well. I was able to read it and I did enjoy some of it. But overall it had quite a few flaws for me.

The first issue I had was the unrealistic way in which the women come together. Decky and Charlie meet briefly a few times. Then they get together for one night. It’s Decky’s first time with a woman and the next day, Decky is saying things like:

“well, I guess it’s settled then. We are a couple and I’m out of the closet, ready or not.”

Really? She wasn’t even in the closet. She had never fallen in love with a woman before. And instead of just wondering where she’s at as I suspect a person falling in love with another person of the same sex and having gay sex for the first time would, she knows now she’s actually gay.

The thing is, Decky’s been hanging out with lesbians for years and never once had any attraction or clear idea that she even might be gay. You’d have thought that she would have had some sort of indication before now. So, somehow that didn’t ring true to me. And it took only one night together to start calling themselves a couple, which came off to me as a bit ridiculous.

The only thing that mitigated that was that their relationship does develop through the rest of the book. So while I can’t say this is a romance in the traditional sense due to no romantic build up, from the point they sleep together they really are a couple and there is some romance as they try to figure out their situation.

This book is written in three parts. The first is Decky and Charlie coming together and the shit hitting the fan in their small community where Decky is well known, that she’s suddenly gay. The second part is about some major homophobia in the form of a whack job mother and dickish guys with the whole “we’ll fuck the lesbian” out of you threats and attacks. Then part three is about them getting justice and the whole town rooting for them. It all came across as too over-the-top and like one huge cliché.

One thing that would have helped this book is if it would have been cut down by a third. The author goes on too many unimportant tangents like descriptions of food, preparing food, local history, as well as detailing daily mundane events that bog things down and take away from more exciting or interesting plot points. Maybe some readers would like all those little details, and they are good to a degree, but I did a lot of skimming through those paragraphs.

Then there’s Decky’s mom. She’s written as a raving homophobic lunatic that apparently the whole town knows is “eccentric” but doesn’t seem to mind. Apparently she has a lot of influence and inspires fear in anyone who dares to oppose her. I think the author was trying for some humor there, but it didn’t cut if for me if that’s the case. Lizzie is crazy. And the fact that she sits on the board of the local university that Charlie has come to teach at and that she is a community leader to some degree had me wondering. If she’s that whacked and unstable, why would she have any position of power in that community? She’s essentially just a bully. It is explained away as a bi-polar condition but her characterization came across as more cunning than having a mental disability.

Moreover, she’s soooo over the top homophobic as to be a caricature. I know people like that exist. And for all I know it’s an actual description of someone the author knows. However, a Westboro Church member, which is pretty much the extreme out there, doesn’t hold a candle to how homophobic Lizzie came across. So, no, she wasn’t just an eccentric character that people would laugh off, or even one that I would think Decky would stick around to get berated for on a regular basis. But that’s me.

Also unrealistic is Charlie defending her at the end. At that point Lizzie comes across then as a poor misunderstood grump. So not how she’s characterized.

The best part of this story was the trial, the last part. And I only got excited because there were some elements of surprise and mystery in how it was written. How Molly, their lawyer, builds the case and breaks down the prosecutor’s case was pretty entertaining. Enough so that my brain finally got engaged, because until then it was like a run on story.

I might try another book of R.E Bradshaw’s. This was her first book and maybe the whole, “isn’t it so exciting that I’m gay now” will not be the focus, but just the two characters and who they are will come out and shine.

Heat level: 1- not erotic- sexual scenarios mostly hinted at.

Grade: D+

Review- Running On Empty Dreams (DVD)

Running On Empty Dreams (DVD)
May 12, 2009
Contemporary/bi/drama

Sydney has played the part of a devoted wife to her husband for years, but her world is shattered when she meets Jane and is instantly attracted to her. She is quickly overwhelmed with the intensity of her love for Jane and the lustful passion that they share. Now Sydney is faced with a choice between the forbidden love that she craves and the undying love of her husband.

I have three words for how I experienced this film. What The Fuck. Seriously, WTF was that? This has to be thee worst film I’ve seen in years: bad acting, totally disjointed story line with all kinds of conflicting issues, plus weird social/political/ religious statements thrown in. There were some good points, but they don’t make up for the train wreck that was most of this film, which is too bad since it could have been really good.

This is going to be a long review, sorry. Basically I’m telling you the whole story since it was all over the place.

It starts out with Sydney and her husband Corey moving to Phoenix, Arizona for a better life. Apparently he will now be able to stay home instead of traveling for his job as a private investigator for a huge firm. Unfortunately, Sydney's been having hand tremors and when she finally collapses, it’s discovered that she has thyroid cancer, a perfectly treatable cancer except for they have NO money. And for some reason the Dr. who tells her this is the coldest prick out there, telling her matter-of-factly that she has to come up with the money or she’ll die, which I didn’t get. Why would she even go back to that turd?

Seriously… I don’t even know where to continue on this review because at this point I find myself wondering what to focus on. This movie was all over the place.

Right away we see that there’s trouble in their marriage that moving and making more money won’t fix. Corey was a marine, a decorated marine, a hero. He’s missing the glory days of that and is constantly looking for constant ego validation that he’s still a hero, and part of that is being able to provide for his family. That sounds great, but he’s wound up a little too tight if you know what I mean and I feared at every turn he would go postal on everyone’s ass.

It doesn’t help that Sydney bitches that he’s never home. But in order to have the money they need, he needs to travel for his job. It's a no-win situation. Unfortunately, for him it’s all about him and Sydney’s dreams of becoming a screenwriter are treated as trivial. Oh and he talks to her like this, “Sydney, you’re going to die, of course I’m thinking of what a waste it is for you to dream about being a writer.” WTF?! To say Sydney’s unhappy is an understatement.

In the meantime, Sydney hooks up with the single mom (Jane) who lives across the street and who’s guy is in jail, to do play dates with their kids. The dialogue between the two is stilted and weird, with Jane saying things like, “you’re not like anyone I know” with her eyes sort of saying, like you know, special….and other weird things that seemed out of place. They carry on a typical platonic girlfriend relationship for a while.

Meanwhile, Sydney and Corey are fighting non-stop. But Sydney does get her cancer taken care of and has to take thyroid medication for the rest of her life now, something she balks and acts incredulous about. WTF?

One day, out of the blue with no lead up, no warning, no close ups of lingering eyes or desires or any indication of Sydney’s growing feelings, without any connection really, she runs over to Jane’s all anxious and bursts out that she’s wanted to kiss her from day one and that she’s going insane with want of her. Jane’s all mellow hippie, Arizona sunshine on the surface, “oh wow, oh cool, like really?”Not shocked at all, but not biting either.

Out of nowhere though comes the classic stereotypical butch lesbian walking by who happens to give an ominous warning to Sydney that she’ll be sorry. This before Sydney and Jane even fully get it on.

Being lonely because Corey is away again, Sydney hangs out with Jane over night and things happen. Like they go for it. After that Sydney goes to the priest to confess that she’s committed adultery. The priest says he can’t help her. WTF? She needs to go to a counselor. She goes home, smashes the bathroom mirror with over acting emo angst, then decides to stop taking her thyroid pills, which will kill her. WTF?

Onto the next WTF? This lesbian shows up again when Sydney and Jane are outside talking about their love, warning them again that they are on the wrong path. When Sydney tells this lesbian---- who’s always dressed like a guy, head band on, sporting tattoos, grabbing her crotch, smoking and talking like John Travolta in Welcome Back Kotter---- to blow it out her ass, this lesbian goes all emo on them, talking tough… “yeah, I’ve fucked women, lots of bitches, I know what it’s all about. I had one, (inhales smoke) but she broke my heart, left my ass, then I found Jesus. He’s the man. He’s the one I give my heart and love to.” OK, W.T.F? All the sudden religion is brought into this? And it just happens to be a lesbian who, “god no, I’d never be with a disgusting man, but I chose to give my life to Jesus,” who gets all judgmental on them? Then she gives Sydney a card to come to church with her to see what a bad, evil thing she’s doing and Sydney goes, “OK.” While Jane laughs it off. WTF?

Sydney goes to this church, which has a congregation of like 2 people, with a female preacher who talks about when you follow God’s plan, you are doing right. Sydney then argues with the lesbian all the way home about what bullshit the church is and how can what she's feeling be so wrong?

So was that whole thing thrown in there to give someone a chance to diss the church’s stance on homosexuality? I tell you, I was getting so many mixed messages from this film. At that point I was starting to feel like this was a thinly disguised homophobic film even though it was about two women falling in love.

In the meantime, Corey is alternately smashing things and or sitting on a pile of steaming rage with controlled stares at the wall because HIS wife left him. He goes over to Jane’s trying to find her, but Jane, twat that she is, laughs in his face and tells him he’s an idiot. OK, first of all, the guy’s about to blow shit up and you’re egging him on? WTF?

Sydney moves in with Jane and they have a nice relationship for about a week. Then Sydney says she got an offer on her script and she needs to go to Sedona, alone, to write this script.

Spoiler about the ending**********************

I’m going to tell you the ending because I can’t imagine anyone would spend a dime or two minutes to watch this film. Sydney goes to Sedona and we see clips of her hanging out, being in nature, happy, content, and then the next thing she’s in a coffin dead. OK, W. T. F! Apparently she never took her pills again and chose to die instead, leaving all her insurance to her husband and kid. OMG.

Then at the funeral, the husband makes a huge scene when Jane shows up. But Jane tells the husband that it was her who saved Sydney that first night when she collapsed on the road, but didn’t say anything because she wanted Sydney to love her without feeling debt. What? OK, so all along Jane was seducing Sydney? She didn’t even know Sydney. Ugh… this movie pissed me off so much at how stupid it was.

End Spoiler***********************

I just didn’t get what this film was trying to say. You supporting gay love? You dissing it?

This is what was shown at the end of the film:

“It’s estimated that 18% - 35% of lesbians in the US were ever married, based on several research studies” –Amity Pierce Buxton, PhD, founder of Straight Spouse Network

“Which are you?”

What? Which am I what? A cheating spouse who’s become a lesbian? A straight chick who’s become a lesbian? A divorced woman who’s now a lesbian? A spouse of a turned gay person?That’s such a weird thing to have at the end of a film. It makes me feel like there’s something subversive going on.

I checked out this site, yes, it does exist, and it’s a group to support spouses and partners of people who “turn” gay or are bisexual and it seems to be pro GLBT in that they don’t advocate trying to change the GLBT partner who has come out. But it’s just weird to see that at the end of a film that sends out mixed messages about the rightness or wrongness of suddenly falling in love with someone of the same sex while being married.

The good parts. Yes there were some good parts. I thought how the women were together was very nice. Very natural once they got together. And it did feel real. If only the acting weren’t so melodramatic or disjointed, this could have been a beautiful film about two women who fall in love. Oh well.

I can’t recommend this film to anyone. Not unless you get off on train wrecks of awfulness.

Heat level: 2. Some nudity, some lesbian kissing.

Grade: D-

Review- The Portal in the Park by Shara Bloodstone

The Portal in the Park
by Shara Bloodstone
2008
Contemporary/ fantasy/erotica/(m/f)-(f/f)-(f/f/f/m) bisexual
20K- $3.75-$5
Ebook- Amber Quill Press

Buy it Amber Quill Press, Fictionwise, ARe

Springtime is blooming in Manhattan when Julie Daniels takes a break from her dance research at the Lincoln Center library. Her visit to an unfamiliar coffee shop renders an eccentric gentleman who serves up more than the average latte. After blending a little magic in her drink, he sends her to a grove hidden deep in Central Park. In addition to the usual flowers and trees, Julie discovers the woodlands also contain mythological creatures. The lusty fauns and seductive nymphs who appear have traveled through a portal in the park. The exotic creatures entice Julie into a realm of passion beyond her wildest dreams, and she embraces the carnal pleasures they offer.

When evening approaches, Julie awakens from a nap to find the magical beings nowhere in sight. And even more frightening, neither is the coffee shop, where the strangeness all began!

Julie would like to write off the bizarre occurrences as a dream, or perhaps an hallucination. But her sated body and spirit convince her otherwise. She’s left to wonder how and why this strange day began—and if it’s really ended...

I have many mixed feelings about this book. But unfortunately, mostly not very good feelings.

From the blurb: “She’s left to wonder how and why this strange day began—and if it’s really ended...”

Yeah, me too.

This story is classified as erotica, so I’m not going to get on its case for the sexual content that really had no rhyme or reason to it. It’s a pure sexual fantasy. What I am going to gripe about is what I consider to be funky writing.

The first thing that jumped out at me was the constant thinking out loud that Julie does. Most often in stories we get insight to what the character is thinking internally but not in the literal sense of saying exactly what they are thinking. When thoughts are written as if the character is actually speaking these things to themselves, verbatim, it’s just awkward. It really kept throwing me out of the story. For example:

Nothing. Just wind over tall grasses, I guess.

Arms akimbo, she completed the circle without seeing another human being.

Nobody. Then why does it feel like somebody's near?

She slid her knapsack down her back and let it fall to the ground.

Maybe I'm picking up on the two lovers getting it on, up in the cherry trees.

She let out a little snigger of laughter and froze.

If I didn't know better, I'd swear somebody just laughed along with me.

Hairs on end, she cocked an ear to the wind...nothing.

Man, I'm losing it. Let me lay down here for a while.

I mean, who does that?

The next issue I had with the writing was the awful prose during the sexual scenarios. I usually have no problem with blunt, in your face graphic sexual language, but this was over the top bad and in places, corny. Or maybe because the set up was not that great, it read more like porn than erotica. Example:

He slid her down to stand and embraced her before turning her toward the tree. He then stroked her bare ass, drawing his hand in and out of her crack.

"Mmm, this is so beautiful. I want to be inside you, in each of your holes."

He spoke between the sultry but relentless forward motion he was using to stretch her pink hole wide.

"You are such a healthy, beautiful human, strong enough to have me in you. Let me fill your beauty up in a way you have never known before. Open your precious ass for me."

While Tichi suckled her breasts and kissed her neck, Fila finger-fucked her, and Faunus pressed his cock halfway down her throat.

And corny:

Her vaginal lips were swollen, pulsing with a tom-tom beat of excitement, and she thought he had to be stimulating her clit with his hand.

"Look," he said, motioning his eyes down toward his groin. "Look at what I have for you. See how great my tool of awakening."

"Yes, but that...you're so big."

Although this is erotica, meaning there doesn't need to be a big love story, I still feel that erotica should contain some sort of emotional connection between the characters or it's basically porn. In this case, I do give kudos to the author for coming up with a creative scenario for Julie to get her freak on without consequence or need to justify to herself anything she’s done. And I actually liked this part. However, I really didn't feel much of an emotional connection between Faunus and Julie. And the main excuse it seems that the author gives for Julie getting to be part in an orgy is that it’s for her “sexual awakening,” as if there’s something wrong with her.

The words “sexual awakening” are mentioned many times in this story. First by the coffee shop owner who hints to her about her sexual awakening. Then when she slips through the portal and is in portal land, she gets her “sexual awakening” by several wood nymphs and a Faun.

Apparently though, “sexual awakening” in this instance mostly means having butt sex. Really, does having anal sex constitute a sexual awakening? This is why I feel the “sexual awakening” as an excuse is pushed on the reader by reinforcement:

Julie blushed even before asking, "And what would that be?"

"Playing, of course. Laughing, drinking, lusting. These are the things we are sent to attend to. Therefore, let us concentrate on them--and, in so doing, attend to your sexual awakening."

These words sent a shiver down Julie's spine.

"My sexual awakening? Why did you say that?"

When he smiled, unabashed sexuality gleamed in his expression.

"Bringing nubile creatures to their sexual awakenings."

She had allowed herself to get into the throes of a "sexual awakening" today, and any hesitation on her part would spoil the effect. She spread her legs to let Fila finger her, gyrating her ass as Fila plied her deeper.

"Shh, I know that," the faun coaxed. "This is your awakening, remember? I promise to pleasure you in all ways. You will be opened after this. In touch with your sexual prowess."

"All right," he said, "I'll awaken you from here."

She felt him dribbling more oil into her crack.

"Now, I will anoint you," he said.

"That's right, Amorfos, let me have you in a way no human man has ever dared. Let your awakening come. Open wide to me."

The trouble for me in this whole “sexual awakening” thing is why does Julie NEED sexual awakening? There was no background story to indicate that Julie was in need of any sexual help or that she was an uptight person sexually. Were her past lovers complaining she never allowed butt sex or sex with women? Was she herself feeling like she wanted to explore her sexuality before all this? Was she frigid? Does not having anal sex and orgies mean that you are not sexually awakened? All this interference by others telling her she needs sexual awakening was a bit weird to me. I would have felt better if Julie had just been seduced only without the insinuation that something was wrong with her.

With no reason that I could see that Julie needs this help to begin with, I also don’t get why she in particular was chosen for a “sexual awakening.” Therefore, to me, this was all a lame excuse for a whole sexual scenario that had no bearing on anything.

For me, it turned what was a good premise into something a bit more corny. Like the short beginnings to a porn flick that pretend the flimsiest excuses for the sex to happen.

Then there was the issue of Julie having sex with a Faun. During the sexual encounter, Julie notes how his fur feels against her skin. And of course, several references to Faunus digging his hooves into the ground for more leverage.

I’m sorry but the descriptions of his humongous cock and his waist down being furry like an animal kind of squicked me out. I just kept picturing Julie having sex with a goat. Not really a turn on. Maybe I’m not sexually awakened enough. Heh.

On the bright side, I rather enjoyed the beginning and ending. The set up of her finding a special coffee shop with an eccentric owner, the whole portal idea, and the end when she goes looking for where she had been, was nicely written. I feel that the author started and ended in the right direction but really veered off course throughout the whole sexual part of this story.

There’s a small part in which there is some f/f, and that’s kind of hotly written. But this is basically a m/f fantasy.

Personally, I’d have pass on recommending this book unless you like raw sexual language and descriptions and or you just want something to titillate you sexually. If you need an emotional connection, I can’t recommend this.

Sex rating: Orgasmic- very graphic sexual language, anal, DP with dildo, f/f, f/f/f/m, m/f, toe sucking, *bestiality* (if you consider sex with Pan bestiality)

Grade: D+

Review- The Duchess, Her Maid, the Groom and Their Lover by Victoria Janssen

The Duchess, Her Maid, the Groom & Their Lover
by Victoria Janssen
Dec. 2008
Historical fantasy
F/F, (F)/F/M
Novel (over 60 k words)
eHarlequin pub-$13.95

By Guest reviewer M. A.

Buy it Amazon, B&N, eHarlequin

Wretched be the woman of wealth and fortune who fails to produce a suitable heir….

And wretched is what Duchess Camille feels living with the cruel and debauched duke. But that soon turns to desperation when she learns her lecherous husband is plotting to have her killed to make way for a more nubile and fertile companion. Knowing she cannot sit idly by and wait for death, she flees into the night, taking with her her own young lover—the stable hand Henri—and her most loyal servants.

With a mind to finding refuge with Maxime, her first love who years ago ignited her sexuality, Camille and her servants take cover in brothels along the way and succumb to the physical delights on offer, sating their longings and fueling jealousies with one another. But the duke's men are not far behind, and Camille knows they must press on, hoping against hope that the man who has every reason to turn her away will remember the fervent passion that once coursed between them.…

If you like underwhelming action, overwhelming angst, and indifferent erotica, you will love this book.

“The Duchess…” had me mentally tearing my hair out because, numerous times, I’d stumble across some good writing and hints that good stuff was coming if I just kept reading. Payoff never occurred.

About 80% of the book is tell-y backstory and angst combined with incidental erotic scenes that did nothing to extend the plot, develop characterization, or contribute to the novel in any other meaningful way.

The remaining 20% showcases a watered-down, lukewarm plot and Janssen’s exceptional gift for beautiful description and world-building. Janssen establishes scenes and settings to involve all the senses. Lush, aromatic gardens, tasty foods, dense forests, crisp, salty seas, grand palaces, humble taverns, and exotic bagnios are all made real.

The protagonist, Camille, is what I sometimes call an “anti-Mary Sue.” She’s unlikeable and unexceptional and yet, for reasons unknown, every relevant character in the novel admires her and/or is in love with her (or, at least, wants to have sex with her.) The common people revere her. Songs and poems are published in her honor. Prostitutes imitate her looks and style to procure patrons who like the fantasy of enjoying sex with her.

The reader is repeatedly told rather than shown that Camille was a good politician who strove to govern her duchy fairly and justly but she was undermined first by her neglectful father (since he considered females unfit to rule) and later by Michel, her abusive husband, desperate to supplant her hereditary right to her duchy.

Camille does many despicable things in the name of furthering her own interests, including ordering Henri, a young stable hand, to service her sexually in hopes of conceiving a child to placate her cruel husband. In typical Mary Sue fashion, Camille does not want to do this and she knows this is wrong. She knows Henri could face exile or execution for defiling her. But all her concerned servants and concerned loyal subjects urge her on out of fear for her safety and Camille allows herself to be persuaded by their demands.

Immediately after her liaison with Henri, however, Camille decides Michel is intent upon murdering her and that she must flee the realm and seek aid with Maxime, ruler of a protectorate territory subject to her duchy. Without any practical considerations or much planning, She takes her maid/bodyguard, Sylvie, two eunuch guards, and Henri.
From here, the novel descends into a dozen chapters of meaningless sexual interludes focused more upon duty than pleasure.

(SPOILER) Examples:

1. Camille initiates a sexual relationship with Sylvie not because she desires Sylvie personally, but because Sylvie’s always been in love with her and Camille feels her loyalty deserves a reward.

2. Camille has sex with her eunuch guards. This is her “duty” as well. Part of the eunuchs’ duty in palace tradition is to provide her with sexual relief and since Camille has never had sex with them (Camille’s 40 years old, and the guards have been in her household for years) her eunuchs feel neglected and worry she finds them inadequate or that she doubts their loyalty. To prove her trust in them, Camille dutifully allows the two eunuchs to gratify her sexually.

3. One of the eunuchs dominates and disciplines a brothelkeeper boarding them. Not because he wants to, but to buy silence in case Michel’s search parties seek them out.

4. After the brothelkeeper submits voluntarily to the eunuch’s dominance and discipline, Sylvie rewards the brothelkeeper with her favors.

5. A nobleman confronts Henri and Camille, claiming to identify Camille. Camille and Henri claim Camille is actually a prostitute made up to look like Camille (ick factor – it’s fashionable in the duchy for whores to copy Camille’s style to indulge patrons desiring Camille.) The nobleman demands sex with Camille. (This scene is edited very strangely. It’s unclear to me if they actually had sex or not. If they did, the erotica was taken out of the book.)

6. When a woman working in an inn identifies Camille, Henri offers her sex for silence. (I found this scene very “icky” because Henri insisted that Camille was actually a prostitute made up to look like Camille and that they were actually fleeing a cruel master who abused them both. The “respectable” innkeeper than has sex with Henri out of sympathy for all the alleged sexual abuse he’s endured in the past. Wow. Just wow. I never imagined accepting sexual bribery from a desperate victim of sex abuse could be seen as “therapeutic” for the abuse victim, but there it is.)

And so on. You get the idea. (END SPOILER)

Most of the erotica is non-titillating in my opinion. This is partly due to the chronic sense of duty and/or obligation attached to most of the sexploits. It’s not about love or even recreational pleasure. The scenes involving Henri and/or Sylvie were the best because these two characters had some enthusiasm for sexual pleasure, at least. I didn’t get to know the characters better, or come to care about them. In fact, I liked Camille less and less the more her servants acted on her behalf for her security.

Normally when I read erotica I experience some degree of sensual titillation or sexual awareness. That never happened here in 200+ pages of near cover-to-cover erotica. I might as well have been reading an accounting textbook. No stimulation emotionally or sexually at all.
In between all the stale sex, Camille angsts about her duchy in Michel’s hands, Michel’s abuse and all her troubles related to it, and seeing Maxime again. She hasn’t seen or communicated with Maxime in two decades.

When Camille is not angsting about all her problems, Henri angsts about his relationship with Camille. He is absolutely fascinated with her and romantically attached to her. Again, she gives him no reason to be so. I did infer that she cared about Henri and felt responsible for him, but it was hard for me to like her for this since – really – she was 100% responsible for endangering him in her “pregnancy scheme” in the first place. Sorry, I don’t give snaps to people for doing what they should.

The “dealbreaker” for me occurred in Chapter 13. Here the author regaled us with yet another lengthy flashback of Camille’s lonely childhood and her first sexual attraction to Maxime. The story implies no romantic interest – not even friendship – these two are strictly interested in sex.

(SPOILER) The two schedule a tryst the evening of Camille’s seventeenth birthday ball. Concealed in the library’s window-seat, Camille witnesses Maxime confronted by an older noblewoman who accuses him of dishonoring Camille, threatens to reveal him to Camille’s evil father who’ll castrate him, and demands sex for her silence.

The situation in itself was absurd since the noblewoman had no proof of Maxime’s intentions, nor did she even know Camille was in the room. Nevertheless, Maxime proceeds to service the threatening noblewoman, clearly under duress and not enjoying himself, while the noblewoman calls him degrading names, orders him not to come, and flounces off after coming.

Sickeningly, although Camille feels outraged on Maxime's behalf that he is forced to perform against his will... she is still aroused and enjoys watching him fulfill the other woman's demands.
This disgusted me beyond measure and I lost what tenuous empathy I had for Camille up to that point.

Imagine a male protagonist getting off on watching his female interest -- even a casual sexual interest -- forced to service another man in order to avoid some unpleasant consequence. Imagine rationalizing it like so:

Camille couldn't help but be aroused now. She couldn't stop imagining herself in the other woman (rapist)'s place. Except she would be nicer to Maxime.

Once the rapist leaves, Camille ventures out of hiding to console Maxime with a blow job. (END SPOILER)

The novel goes on to reveal what is patently obvious to anyone paying attention, that Camille is a damaged woman who takes advantage of others for her own benefit (although her actions are chronically justified because she’s an aristocrat, a neglected daughter, and a battered wife.)
I found it impossible to identify with or sympathize with this character.

I continued reading because I’d been advised the story gets better. To some extent it does, but it’s too little too late. I did recognize SOME changes to Camille, but they were too minor for me to care.

I think the author wanted readers to applaud Camille for having an “epiphany” of sorts and taking responsibility for herself and for her problems. But she never comes through.

(SPOILER) In the end, after her arduous escape from her husband’s cruelty, Camille rides right back into her territory and takes over. Yes, that’s right. She never lifted a finger. The common people all loved her so much and hated Michel so much, they overthrew him and placed him under house arrest. Everyone volunteers to murder him, but Camille-Sue will have none of that. She simply exiles her ex-tormentor. Sylvie, her trusty friend/maid/bodyguard/sidekick, is turned out to indulge a female ménage a trois with some village women. The eunuchs leave to enjoy their not-so-secret homosexual relationship. Henri remains as Camille’s lover and mainstay although he understands he must share her with Maxime whom Camille still does not love. (END SPOILER)

*shudders* I’ve read worse, but not much.

Technical/mechanical: editorial was mostly clean. As mentioned earlier, there were some odd transitions and disjointedness with scenes. The narrative read to me like at least one scene was removed but the follow up writing wasn’t “smoothed over” to reflect that.

Cover Art: The cover’s gorgeous but does not relate to the novel in any way. I admit I was expecting something more “lighthearted” and “romping” because of the cover and the title.

Sex Rating: Orgasmic - for graphic sexual scenes only. I opt not to [personally] rate this book because I don’t find it sexy. The book is chock full of sexual situations, but none of them “touched” me.

Grade: D (This is a substandard work no matter how I look at it. The erotica is unexciting and the romance doesn’t get enough “spotlight” to compensate. From a literary viewpoint, Camille’s self-discovery is uninteresting.

NOTE: I’d like to add the novel has received mainly good to average reviews. Taste is subjective. I probably would have given the book a C-minus were it not for the Chapter 13 revelation. That was just too big an ick factor for me to remain neutral about.

Reveiw- When Katie Came Over by Arden Hill

When Katie Came Over
by Arden Hill
2008
Contemporary/ Lesbian/ light BDSM-ish/ erotica
4k- $2.00
Ebook

Pub: Loveyoudevine

When an established top who writes erotica under the pen name Sangre hires a woman to assemble a porch swing, she gets more than she pays for. Katie, a college student and novice in the practice of kink, has read much on the subject, including the work of Sangre, and is eager to experience the reality of bottoming to an experienced player. Soon Sangre is taking a break from writing scenes to gather more hands on research. She channels her creative energy into tutoring Katie as to how to turn her on. With the help of some specially designed restraints and a gorgeous glass dildo, Sangre also draws pleasure from Katie making her beg and moan for a well deserved release. In, When Katie Came Over, both top and bottom are rewarded by creative erotic collaboration.

I have just one thing to say about this story. Don’t bother.

Sangre has MS and is a well known erotica writer who hires Katie to put together a porch swing. Katie is a young college student just trying to make some extra money. Sangre is using voice recognition to write her book and Katie overhears her writing/speaking an erotic scene in her book. They quickly establish that they are both are lesbians and that Katie is a bottom. How we know this is because Katie says that she is and hints at being fairly experienced in kinky sex. In short order Sangre is telling her to get into the cuffs and they are getting it on.

First, this story is only a few pages long. It’s an extremely rare author who can do any story justice in a few pages and there was no justice done to this story. Second, it’s not well written, with a complete lack of character build up and plot really. Moreover, the only sexual situation portrayed barely kept me interested enough to even keep reading.

It is erotica, so yeah, I’m not expecting an elaborate well developed story, however, even on the level of erotica, which is pretty much mostly sex, it fell way short. The sexual scenes were very slow and boring with absolutely no chemistry or heat between the characters.

Even the whole light BDSM- bottom/top or what ever was going on came across as unrealistic and a bit off to me. I think if the author had at the very least made me feel some kind of connection between these two women, then I would have had a different feeling. If this book weren’t so short to begin with, I would have dropped it before it did end, with no reason to keep reading.

Sex rating: Technically it’s graphically written. But it was so boring I can’t say it’s too spicy. f/f- lesbian. Minor BDSM- hand cuffs, dildo use.

Grade: D-

Review- Gold Fever by Missy Lyons

Gold Fever
by Missy Lyons
May, 2008
Western/ erotica
Category- 32K --$5
Ebook

Buy it Phaze, Fictionwise

Taming the Wild West, or taming wild men? Neither should be left to young virgins. After Barbara Lane inherits a gold mine, she travels to California, only to find she has an unwanted partner waiting for her. Vincent is the kind of bad boy she knew to stay away from. Instinctively, Barbara knows if she stays, she won't be innocent for long.

Vincent is no gentleman, and he has no intention of changing for any woman, let alone the spitfire who moves in and makes herself at home. He isn't about to give up his whoring, or his gambling, and definitely not his bed. If Barbara wants to stay, she will have to learn to share.

What will Barbara do to win his heart? Or perhaps the question should be, what wouldn't she do...

Barbara is proper woman from the East Coast in the late 1800’s when she finds out that her father, who abandoned her and her mom when she was a baby, has left her a gold mine in California. Totally miffed that she’s saddled with this thing she knows nothing about but not having any more resources to take care of herself, she heads out there to see if she can sell it. What she hasn’t been told is that her father had a partner who still lives on the property.

Having nowhere to go, she and Vincent, her father’s partner, decide to work and live together with an uneasy set up of them both sharing a bed and the house. Both, of course, have the hots for each other and they slowly start a sexual relationship. But Vince won’t marry her so she leaves Vince and goes to the local brothel to work as she has nowhere else to go or any other way to make money. One patron wants her all to himself and asks her to marry him, which she agrees to until Vince shows up.

Ok, there were just so many things about this book that pissed me off that I really don’t know where to begin.

First, I bought this book for the potential f/f in it. There were some minor scenes that were OK, but totally written as two women getting it on for the guy’s pleasure. The only thing that saved that part for me was that the women liked it themselves as well. So, OK.

That in itself would have been the only thing that bothered me if the m/f story in this was appealing, but the m/f part of this story irked me way more on so many levels. Even the HEA ending wasn’t enough for me to get over what an ass Vincent is and what a doormat Barbara is. Both were characters that I just didn’t like really.

The good: Yes, there was some. While overall I disliked this book, the first half of it was very nice. I did really like it and it did intrigue me enough to keep reading. Barbara has some spunk and acts indignant at Vince’s advances, which I liked. After all, she considers herself a lady and knows what’s proper and what’s not. She’s sexually innocent and although she finds herself very attracted to Vince she keeps it on a respectable level as she wants to stay a “lady.”

And Vince, although the typical bachelor type man who drinks and whores around, manages to keep his hands off of Barbara and respect her space and being. So I liked him in the beginning as well. The sexual tension was nicely done for that part of the book and I thought there’s going to be a snappy, fun dance between these two. But then about half way through this book descends into “you can’t be serious” territory and I started getting agitated.

The bad and ridiculous:

Barbara wants desperately to stay respectable. She’s affronted when a local shop owner takes her for a whore and tries to sell her clothing she would need to work at Annie’s brothel. This because she has huge, gorgeous breasts. We the reader know that because her huge, large, humongous, perfect breasts are mentioned over and over throughout the book. But I digress… the breast thing will come up again when I talk about Vince.

Although Barbara wants to stay a lady and worries often about her reputation living together with a man, she decides one day that she wants to finally know what sex is and gives into Vince.

Vince, who is a breast man, stating over and over how the first thing he notices about a woman is her breasts and talks about other women's breast often comparing sizes, can’t wait to get his hands on hers. Although she’s tentative as she has no experience, he can feel that she’s about to give and he convinces her to go for it by telling her there are ways to have sex and stay a virgin. And he’s so altruistic in his motives.

He didn't want another man teaching her about love. He couldn't stand the thought of some other lucky bastard taking her virginity.

"There are ways a man can love a woman without taking her virginity. Would you let me love you like that?"

How he goes about this is by making her first time experience be an anal one. What got me here is that suddenly it’s her virginity and keeping it that makes her respectable. And not the fact that she’s having all kinds of sex, doing every nasty little thing except for vaginal sex with a man she’s not married to. As if the local “ladies and gentlemen” would excuse her behavior because she’s still a virgin. Don’t get me wrong, I’m only judging this based on what Barbara herself as a character has insisted on over and over.

Then after their first act of love, if you want to call it that, she makes the mistake of mentioning marriage. Oops.

"That must be why everyone wants to get married so badly."

He stiffened at the statement. "Marry you? Oh no, honey, I hope you know that I am not going to marry you just because I fucked you."

Oh, how honorable of him. But then instead of getting insulted, she gets doey eyed innocent and starts acting dumb about it as if that makes the fact that she’s diddling him all right for her.

He smiled. "That is a performance I wouldn't mind repeating, sugar. And you are technically still a virgin, but if you want me to correct that deficiency, I would be happy to solve that for you."

"After all that, I am still a virgin?"

"You may have lost your innocence but not your virginity, and you'll only lose that when you decide you want to give it up to me," he said smugly.

"I want to give it to the man who marries me, Vince."

"You don't always have to feel loved to be fucked, and you don't have to fuck because you love. If you ever change your mind, I will still be here, hun. And I promise I'll be as gentle as I can be and make your first time an event to remember."

I hate this asshole. And I’m starting to hate how Barbara just rolls over for him like that and has zero self respect. She was a spitfire in the beginning. But that’s what happens when a man gives you great orgasms I guess.

After weeks of non-stop virginal sex while they live together, they strike it rich by finding a hefty gold nugget, which means that Barbara can now sell her half of the mine. At this point though, Barbara really gets that Vince will never marry her and she decides she must leave him. But first, just to prove something, I don’t know what really, she wants him to take her virginity and they finally have mind blowing “real” sex, at which point she says:

"Am I ruined yet?"

Then he so lovingly says:

"Lord, I hope so. I want you ruined for all other men. I want you for me and me alone, sugar."

As he spilled his seed into her, she whispered to him, holding tightly to his back. "I belong to you, Vince. No one else but you."

Yes, he’s such a worthy man that she feels she will never love anyone else but knows he will never love her. So she decides to do the next best thing, become a whore at Annie’s brothel. And she’s a shoe-in too because of her bodacious breasts and curvy body, according to Annie.

While at the brothel, she finds that her sexual needs are much and that she enjoys the sex. She’s even turned on by Kitty, the girl who teaches her the ropes as it were. And then she gets lucky because one customer, after only the first time with her, wants her as his own, which practically means she will get married.

But then Vince shows up, all pissed off with her walking away and tries to convince her that he loves her without actually coming out and saying it, of course. First he’s incredulous that she might have slept with another man.

"Did he fuck you already then?"

"Your fiancé?" He shot her a penetrating look as she rose. "I knew I should have ruined you when I had the chance."

Nice of him to show he cares. Then he tries to say that this other man only wants her for her money, the gold nugget.

His face grew red with suppressed rage. He tried another tack. "All he wants is your gold, Barbara."

"How do you know?" she asked, keeping her voice calm.

"He doesn't know you like I do."

"He wants me. More than you do. He asked me to marry me—which is more than you ever did."

So basically, he loves her so much that he has to insult her by telling her that she can’t be loved for herself, she’s wanted for her money only.

And then finally, he tries to convince her by having sex with her, which works. OMG, of course, the almighty penis wins again. She’s in love with him and he finally manages to convince her that he loves her by having sex with her and she goes for it.

To be honest here, the very end did have me believing that Vince does love her. Yes, I felt he does, but maybe it’s just because he couldn’t have her considering how selfish he is.

But after all that horrible, insulting behavior towards Barbara, she should have made him sweat and really work for her love. And he wasn’t contrite at all. Up until the point that she takes off he basically treats her like his personal sex toy to do what he wants with. And Barbara just lets him.

In the end, this book didn’t really do it for me. I’d say that on writing alone Missy Lyons writes fairly well. But I really don’t know who the target audience is for this book because much of it read as titillation for a man, most of it in favor of the male POV. And I can’t imagine women who want to read this as a romance could get on board with liking Vince on any level.

If you take this as pure erotica, well then, this book can be a good read. But the sex alone couldn’t carry this even if it is hot. And the fact that this is set up as a romance and ends as a romantic HEA, puts this into the romance category and I have to judge it as such.

Sex rating: Orgasmic- the sex was very graphically written and being erotica, just about everything was in here. Anal, some minor girl on girl, light bondage, and titty fucking. While I give it a rating of Orgasmic for hot sex, I was a bit turned off by the assholish nature of Vince, which made the sex less of a turn on for me.

Grade: D

Review: Servicing Lady Tremayne by Emma Wildes

Servicing Lady Tremayne
by Emma Wildes
2006
Erotic Historical
Novella- 30 pages
E-Book

Buy it Phaze
$3.00

Trying to maintain a pristine reputation isn't easy, especially when Lady Daphne Tremayne has a lustful secret longing for her doctor. Seducing a respectable physician is not something a lady would normally do but then again, desperate times make for inventive measures.

Being summoned to the home of his alluring patient, Thomas Blake cannot quite believe what it is exactly she wishes him to cure. Since he has always been deeply attracted to the beauteous Daphne, he has no objections to ministering to her desires but the lady in question only wants his sexual services nothing more. Or so she says but just maybe he can change her mind.

Forbidden passion and an ugly obsession make two lovers tear the down the barriers of social status and find that physical love just might not be enough after all.

This is a very short story really and I’m going to say not really worth the money or the time to read it. I really liked Emma Wildes’ The Arrangement and was hoping this story would be something of the same quality, but it was rather disappointing.

On story telling only, it was OK, but not great. It starts out nicely with the widow Lady Tremayne feigning malaise to get the good looking Dr. Thomas Blake to her bedside in order to proposition him into discreetly servicing her sexually. A commitment free arrangement as she has no intentions of marrying again. Of course, since he’s been secretly lusting after her and the lady is the most beautiful woman desired by all, he has no problem agreeing. This part of the story was fine, written very nicely and it did hook me in.

Where it starts to go a bit off for me is when Thomas decides that impregnating her would be a good way to “get” her. Now, it’s clear that she’s got the hots for him and she’s falling in love with him. And she’s not adverse to the idea of marrying him even though she’s of a much higher station then he in society. He is, in general, an upstanding kind of guy. But what is that, really? Even he thinks he’s an ass. “I might impregnate her, he thought traitorously.”

Next, he takes her to a brothel without letting her know what kind of place she’s in to be serviced, for his convenience and turn-on mainly, by several of the prostitutes there who have told him that they all get each other off when it’s slow. This, even though he has broached the idea of some kinky stuff with the Lady and she pretty much says she’s not interested.

While it’s clear that these two have the hots for each other and they are falling in love, what’s with all the trickery on his part? It was unnecessary as it’s clear these two are meant to be together and have a HEA. It was off-putting.

The writing itself was a bit lazy to me as well with much of the dialogue feeling stilted and unnatural with more telling and less showing of what the characters are feeling. But this is a really short story, so I don’t expect too much on that front and am willing to forgive a lot if the story itself is appealing.

Since this is a blog for the purpose of promoting quality f/f, f/f/m content in books, I will say that the f/f content in this story was solely for the male POV. While the prostitutes do enjoy women, and the Lady responds physically getting off of course, she feels no emotional involvement as she states later on and it’s clear she could have skipped that experience altogether. If the Lady would have said that she had such fantasies when Thomas asked, it would have had a whole different feel to me. As it was, it felt that that scene was thrown in there just to add some kink to the story. So this isn’t a story I can recommend for readers who would buy this book for the f/f, f/f/m content.

Sex content: Damp panties. m/f, f/f/f/f- male watching.

Grade: D+

My review of The Arrangement